Chapter 27 – Make You Feel

 

Wednesday, 3 February 2016.

 

Day 45

 

Diary Dear,

Hope you’ve been having a nice day. Have you…?

Me? Thanks for asking. 🙂

Ah, I’ve been thinking…

 

Have you realized how we tend to show different sides of our personality to different people?

Some folks trigger our sense of adventure. Others bring about our empathetic and caring sides.

Or our rage, for that matter (as if I knew anything about that! 😅).

 

With some martians you may feel like you talk too much and – uh-oh – just suck at listening. (I hate the feeling)… With others it’s infinitely better – there’s great balance in the interaction, a 60-40% split.

Some mortals have the natural ability to calm you down, maybe even make you experience a wonderful sense of abundant satisfaction. Contentment, pure and simple.

Sigh.

Isn’t it so?

There are adoring guys out there that make one feel happier, pretty and valuable. Visible! While other people perhaps treat you like a bit of an outsider. Stupid? Miserable? Nervous? They make you feel like you are a little bit boring?

Fat!! Gosh. Please, not fat!!

That’s why I prefer taller, chubbier guys. I feel slimmer and… They’re so cute! Snugly 🐼😍!

 

With Mr. Ex I always felt fat. 😕 Unaccepted.

He was too fit for me – and the guy didn’t go through one single fat day is his life. Lucky bastard.

Unfair!

Anyway…

We tend to like the people that help us feel good about ourselves. The ones who bring out our best sides. Our favorite qualities. Especially human beings who just make us feel loved and accepted for who we are.

People there for us through the thick and thin. Challenging us and helping us grow as a human bean (like Kristiina likes to joke). Those immortals are irreplaceable.

I have always been lucky to have friends like that. Thank God.

 

Hey, I need to tell you… Something’s up!

Yesterday, Riku wrote in light our date tomorrow. Remember the Norwegian god? I told him, “Well, finally! You haven’t been chatting with me at all!!”

“Anna, I feel there’s some important information I need to disclose before we meet up. I don’t know how you’ll feel about this, but I just need to tell you that I am blind of an eye.”

Oh, poor guy! That’s sad. 🙁

“And it has affected my appearance. The aesthetics of my face. Will you mind much? If you want to cancel the date, I’ll understand.”

Gosh, no!

“But I do wear an eye patch.”

“Oh, sorry to hear about your condition, Riku. I hope it doesn’t hurt… Of course I’m coming to the date. I’m not a superficial person… and I’m not perfect either. Who is?”

(I tell him about the big scar that I have in my abdomen).

 

“Riku, what will matter to me is our chemistry. Will we have any? You don’t write much. Is there a special reason for that or are you a very calm type?”

He tells me he’s wasted way too much time chatting with women he never got around to meeting in the end, so he’s got no more energy for that. But yes, he discloses again, he’s the very peaceful, very calm type.

“Hmm. That could be a problem… You see? I am very energetic and like lively conversations and interaction.”

He assures me it’s just the written chats that he doesn’t like.

“OK, then. Let’s meet tomorrow and see what kind of chemistry we feel around each other. You look handsome, I’m sure. Your pics are great!”

Now I understand why his artistic photos only showed half of his face…

 

And then we just discuss the basics.

What time? He asks to meet at 16:30. Only half an hour after I get home from work – ops!

Where? Well, since I’ll be in a huge hurry to get pretty, I ask him to come to the Nepalese restaurant in my neighborhood.

What to wear? After Tinder Date 7, I feel I need to mentor guys a little.

“Hey Riku, I’d say casual but nice. I think men look so gorgeous in smart shirts 😍! What do you say?”

 

So, Diary Dear… I’ll let you know how it goes, I promise. My curiosity sure is ignited.

Let’s see.

© 2017 rf

 

 

Obs. Day 45 since moving out.