More coming soon!

 

Saturday, 6 January 2018.

 

Hi friends,

Happy New Year!!

I’m back from a wonderful ten-day trip to England with my son. We loved every minute, even the three missed flights, delays and the 40h which took us to get back to Helsinki.

It was very, very special to meet and spend time with beloved people, friends, cousins, CT2…

During the trip, Joey decided that my cheeks are very round and its muscles strong. Haha. He teased me every day about them, “Mom, you are so cute!” pinching them and smiling at me. Believe it or not, that was one of the highlights of our trip. Isn’t it wonderful when your 16-year-old likes to hang out with you?

We had a great time! Especially in Windsor, Sandhurst, Greenwich and Hammersmith. 🙂

 

windsor

(Anna in Windsor)

 

london

(Joey on Westminster Bridge)

 

Today is my first day back home. Joey is out at a sleepover and I’ve taken the whole day to be silent. No music, no TV, no people or phones until 9 p.m.

I’ve been reflecting about who I am, how I’ve changed, who I aspire to be.

Still the same – hopefully a good person – happy, energetic, affectionate, etc. But calmer, more content, stronger and more trusting than ever.

No New Year’s resolutions, but good plans already put into action: sports, healthy foods, healthy thoughts…

Being present and caring with others.

Reading more classics.

Watching all the Star Wars movies with my son – I have never, can you believe it?

Treating myself as my best friend would.

Doing more of the things that I love and want to do.

Investing in a better future version of myself, even as I grow older on the outside. May inner beauty grow – may the ugly parts of our selves get smaller.

Believing and dreaming on! There is a time for everything. So, no more sadness, no fear, no despair. Life is good!

Finishing the book about Anna’s 2016 in love. Now I know how to go about it… so expect new chapters every week. 🙂

 

Dear friends, enjoy 2018. Be happy!

Love,

Annita

 

 

Merry Xmas, Dear All! S2

 

24 December 2017.

 

Merry Xmas, Mr. One out there, family, friends, everyone!

Today, my amazing daughter Kristiina surprised me with special gifts. Very well planned, very affectionate. If you have read chapter 21 – Anniversary – you’ll see.

Lindt chocolates, socks… You’ll understand the bird reference later, in book 2. Haha.

Could she have been any more thoughtful?!?

Check these out:

 

IMG_3793

IMG_3794

 

IMG_3803

IMG_3795

 

Seriously? She’s the sweetest! S2

Love her sooooo much!

Joey and I are going on a special Xmas trip, where he’ll get me something I choose, too! S2

Hmmm, so who needs men?? Hmm. Well, I want Him.

Mr. One.

I need him – to make me even happier than I already am. 😀

And while there’s a bump in the road… Yes! I am happy and will remain so! It’s a decision. No more tears. Not too many, anyway. Just good emotional ones, from time to time, just to feel so very alive.

Stronger and happier each day – appreciating the wonderful people and the wonderful love I have in my life. Like Kristiina’s. Like Joey’s. Riitta’s, Marcos’s. Sarah’s, Moses’s. Ida’s. Lisa’s. CT2’s. James Bond’s…

Like yours!! S2

 

And so you wonder, who needs men? Why did Kristiina write that? Where is Christian???

Well… keep reading. 🙂

 

 

Obs. Feliz Natal! God jul! Hyvää joulua! Feliz Navidád! Merry Xmas! xxx

 

 

 

 

Chapter 82 – Yes, Definitely!

This blog is a book. Maybe better to read from the beginning? 🙂

 

Thursday, 26 February 2016.

 

18:25   Hi Chris, sweetheart! 😊 This afternoon I ran 10 km, walked 6 and cycled 5. In the cold! I wonder what has made me this motivated… Or who has. 😊 Here’s another acrostic for you. It popped into my mind during the run:

C aring

H onorable

R omantic

I ngeniously competitive

S exy

T all, talkative and tasty

I ncredibly cute

A mazing

N aked in the sauna? Yes, definitely!

Wishing you were here!

 

18:34   Hi Annita. I was waiting for your messages… 😊 I love the acrostic! ❤️‍ And would love to be with you. Great workout there. I like that you’re active – you have a nice body. And the right height. Pocket size. 😊

Need to see you soon. Would love a hot, romantic get-away with you. Long weekend by a fireplace.

Then we have a choice… I come over and we rent a cottage. Or you come with me to Spain! Or both. 😊

Aww. I’d love Spain, someday. But I told my teens that I’d like taking them abroad first, since their dad has just come from the Bahamas…

18:40   Fair enough. Can we rent that cottage you like so much?

I’ve only been there with extended family. But I’ll check! 😊 You made me get used to good loving all day and every night.

I want to eat more grapes with you.

😊 Yum. And I want to draw a tattoo on you!

I love your belly button.

18:43   You haven’t drunk from my navel yet.

OK. I just need 4 things……

Fire…

Sauna…

Snow…

More champagne…

And you. OK, five. 😊 Are you wearing my t-shirt tonight again? Feels odd not seeing you. 😞

Odd = sad

19:30   That’s the fourth time you say you’re sad not to be with me since yesterday. Yay! I’ll tell you a secret. Have worn your T-shirt all day since yesterday (except for the run).

Nice. 😊 I had nothing to wear of yours… 😞

Next time! Feels that I’m closer to you and that you are hugging me a little. And I can smell of you.

I know what you mean. I miss your smell. But I remember it. 😊

Sweet. I miss your profile.

Profile? Tinder?

No! Looking at the profile of your face while you close your eyes and cuddle up close to me.

God I miss that. 😞 

Censured

Censured addictive. It feels like ages since I saw you. And months since we first met!

Feels like I’ve known you for a year. Really! Almost falling asleep here. Nap time!

You are the only person to keep me awake till 5 am these days. 😊 That’s a compliment.

23:00   Next time I’m there, I’d love to see some more old movies. Naked. You in my arms. Little ears. Which I would pull and tweak. 😊

23:01   This morning my daughter came to visit and she said I looked younger, happier and invigorated. I wonder why.

Well……. you looked young and happy whenever I saw you 😊. I’m booking that cottage. It’s a done deal! Can I call you tomorrow? I miss hearing your voice.

Meeting my good friend Justin tomorrow. For lunch. Off to bed now. Sweet dreams. No nightmares. But if you do… tell me. Kiss on your lips, censured, and a little bite on your tongue.

Night night, handsome. Lots of good things to look forward to. Mmm. Can’t wait! Miss you, too! Xx

 

© 2017 rf

 

 

Obs. Sad four times!! 🙂

 

 

Chapter 81 – Enveloped

 

Thursday, 25 February 2016.

 

Fire, sugar and longing.

He’s not there physically, but she feels happy; completely enveloped by him.

Wearing his T-shirt to sleep – having many, many sweet dreams.

 

© 2017 rf

 

 

Obs. He writes that he is sad with longing 4 times. 🙂

 

 

Chapter 80 – Sad

This blog is a book. Maybe better to read from the beginning? 🙂

 

Thursday, 25 February 2016.

 

 

Anna has been her best self this week.

She felt appreciated for who she is.

She’s so happy, my friends! Every woman deserves that…

Chris and Annita got to see a few different sides of each other, and now she wants to keep exploring what they have got in store. The best of what life has got to give? Slowly, no rush.

Time flies.

 

13:54   Just taking off. Thanks so much for taking me to airport. And for a magical week. I can’t wait to see you again soon. Enjoy the rest of your holidays and speak soon. Think of me when you eat your grapes. 😊

 

Instead of answering his message, she calls her best friend Lisa to tell her about her spring break.

“And ohhhh, Lisa. It was so fun! I felt so relaxed. You know how hard-working I am, right? Always doing something in the house and at work – a thousand projects for me and for others…

“But this week a miracle happened. I just stopped everything. I just enjoyed myself. I even sat on the sofa a few times, can you imagine that? Christian made me stop all the rush. Naturally. Just like that.”

“Seriously? Is that even possible?”

“Awww. He called our week magical. And yes, that’s the best way to describe it. It was magical!”

“Really?” Liisa giggles “Tell me more!”

“Gosh, I feel I’m like I’m 20 years old again! I had free time, dates. I was treated with courtesy and good mood. English manners are super sexy. All these hugs, this affection. Pure joy!

“I felt important, Lisa. Well, I certainly retributed. He earned it…

“Why did I stay in the marriage that long? Tell me, am I just dreaming now? Do tell me!”

“I’m so excited for you, Anna!”

“Thanks, Lisa. And thank you, Tinder.” Ding! “Hey, Christian is texting me now. Haha.”

 

17:11   I made it. Fell asleep and the passenger beside me woke me up after landing. Must have thought I died.

 

“Wait… Lisa, he is trying to call me on WhatsApp now. Can I call you back?”

Anna takes Christian’s call.

“Hello,” she says sweetly.

“Hi.”  there’s laughter in his voice “It’s only me. I’ve just landed. I miss you so much that I had to hear your voice again,” he says with longing.

“That’s awesome. I miss you, too.” smiles.

 

She texts him immediately after they hang up.

 

My pleasure taking you to the airport. That way I got to touch and kiss you a little more. 😊

I have some nice plans for tonight, starting with a long nap soon… I’ll miss your ears, Chris. And how you love sleeping! I’ll miss trying to wake you up.

 

She sends him the pics of their last date at Gringos Locos and Töölö Bay. Especially their kiss selfie.

 

Mmm, couldn’t stop biting your tongue. Totally irresistible. 😊 I miss you. Xx.

Anna, thanks for the pics. I’m feeling quite sad to have left you there. ☹️

I saw my son. Glad he remembers me. Hope you will wear my t-shirt tonight. Where are you sleeping? Sofa? Floor? Bed? Chair? I will imagine you next to me. And I’ll be back. 😊

There are still so many games for us to play, Christian. And I can’t believe it you beat me in some! I want my revenge. More movies, forests, walks, hugs. Would love to show you many nice places. My favorites. We also need to try out other kinds of saunas. You’re sweet! 😊

 

In the next few weeks (well, months), they’ll be chatting more avidly than ever. There will be frequent visits, mind-blowing dates, hot getaways, more and more unforgettable texts, precious voice messages, movie nights, novel games, new tricks for old dogs…

Sharing, dreaming, touching, growing fond of, having fun, feeling inspired, challenging one another, missing, praying, trusting, believing, questioning and way too many crises, too. Eurgh. They’ll take the good with the bad. Grateful. Appreciative. Sometimes feeling sadness and doubt. Hopeful.

And then… hmmm.

But, who knows what tomorrow will bring?? One day at a time. No rush.

© 2017 rf

 

 

Obs. Missing him soooo very much!

 

 

Chapter 79 – Gringos

This blog is a book. Maybe better to read from the beginning? 🙂

 

Wednesday, 24 February 2016.

 

 

That week, when they’re apart for his work calls and her visit with relatives, they text each other.

 

Christian, what an adorable place you have in Spain! I looked at the link you sent me. Happy for you. Now I’m ashamed of my lack of space. Though very grateful with the life I’ve got. So many have so much less than me…

Oh! Spain was my home for a long time. I miss the fireplace, most of all. And the quiet. Your place is lovely, Anna. It’s all about maximizing space.

Yes! I make the most out of it. Keeping organized. And as long as my home is filled with love, the bills are paid, there’s healthy food and I can give my teens the occasional treat, I’m more than satisfied.

Trust me. You are doing an amazing job.

What kids want the most is attention, anyway.

Your children are lucky. And I can see you have lots of interest, passion and energy. I’m sure your ex is a good dad, as well.

Yes, he is. And thanks, I really do. I just need to heal my feelings a bit.

 

It’s always intense, their back and forth interaction.

Their holidays together just keep getting better. More fun! They play short, strategic board games with lots of competitiveness – Ticket to Ride, Nexus, Ingenious. They laugh, watch more movies and then there’s all that crazy-sweet loving.

They’re chatting in the shower now, getting ready to go out. This will be their last night together.

This week!

“Yeah Chris, I know myself and what I dream of. I don’t want to live alone forever – of course not. But it would be crazy to be in a hurry, after a 20-year-long marriage behind me. I’ve gotta be wise.”

“But maybe in a year? Maybe then? I understand you, Anna, and need time, too.”

“Maybe one. Maybe two. Hopefully not more! Then my teens will have been raised.” Is he just curious? It’s interesting that he is bringing up this topic already. I must have made quite an impression, then. Cool.

“I think you like me, Chris!”

“OMG, you are fantastic, Anna. You are the whole package. The whole package! Really! I’m amazed.”

“You are? I am? How come?!” She smiles happily.

“Oh, Annita. You’re organized, hard-working, fun, sweet, smart.”

“Mm, what else? Keep it coming.”

“And so beautiful, sexy girl!” He pinches her cheeks.

I am?! — “Of course I am, Chris. And you’re not bad either.”

 

Yesterday, he took her out on dates to Stones – for a quick happy hour – and then to Vapiano, near Stockmann. Vapiano was quite boring and she almost left, because he was very late in coming to meet her there. Humpf. A bunch of business calls for his start-up and such. He apologized, of course, but hmm.

Now it’s his last night in Helsinki, and “I want to make it special, Anna. No phones, no hurry. Choose one of your favorite places and I’ll take you there!”

“Gringos Locos it is, then!”  with delicious food and an authentic feel   “They have such cool decorations, Chris. With real ponchos and sombreros from Mexico. It’s not a franchise, you know… Joey and Kristiina love the place, too!”

(Later in 2017, Gringos is shut down and a new restaurant called Hooks is opened in the same location. Haha. Must be destiny, but Anna hasn’t been there yet…)

 

The winter air is crisp and dry, as Christian and Anna walk the 4 km to their last date night this week, stopping to take some pictures of each other by the Töölö Bay. And kiss, of course. Great memories!

They’ve joked and had a chat with the cute, tattooed waiter – they’ve eaten the marvelous entrecôte – and now they are sitting there, just smiling and looking at each other. Not a care in the world.

“Anna, your teeth are so white! I like your fashion sense, but I love your happy smile. Really, how can your teeth be this white?”

“Haha. I think you’re just comparing them to heavy tea-drinkers’ teeth, English guy. Mine are just normal…”

“No. They’re really white!”

“You’re funny, Chris!”  First time a date has praised my pearly whites. Haha!  “Btw, I like the shirt you’re wearing tonight, lover boy!” She smiles looking into his vulnerable, beautiful eyes. His gaze says a thousand things his mouth won’t utter. “I’ve had a happy week, Christian. Thank you for all these dates!”

“Thank you, Anna. I never knew whether you’d want to see me again.”  His voice sounds vulnerable, too! — “The same mystery every afternoon! You were always plotting, huh………?” Silence.

He looks at her with a quizzed look on his face. “Will you want to see me again when I come back?”

She hasn’t been plotting – no!

She has simply been wondering about him and his life, because I can already tell I like this charming guy.

What is he looking for, really? What can I become to him eventually? What’s the potential? I just want a boyfriend for now – is that too much to ask in life?

That’s it – a bf.

And this week has surpassed my expectations…

 

“There you go plotting again! With The Look!” He protests jokingly.

“Chris… I just want to share the simple good things in life with someone special. Nothing mysterious there. Good movies. Games. Sports. Loving. Friendship. Trips… Hmm. Are you special, Christian? Hmm. Let me see… Ah, maybe you’ll do.” She teases him, laughing affectionately. “Yes! I want to see you again.”  pause “But do enjoy your son in Berlin, in the meanwhile.” In that feminine voice she’s growing used to now.

“Phew! In that case, I’ll be back with you soon, Annita!” He is a natural sweetie, isn’t he?

And… She’s getting a serious crush. Is he really coming back??

I’ll just have to wait and see. Guys have to do their part. My bf will!

 

Hand in hand they take the walk back home from Gringos.

Something has been bugging her for 2 km, so they have to stop.

She holds onto him with one arm, takes off her right boot and rolls down her hold-up pantyhose that has ripped and is hurting her toes.

“Are you going to repeat that naked-outside-wearing-just-your-overcoat-and boots drill, Annita?”

“Haha. No. That was spontaneous… You know I had to change the parking meter fast, don’t tease me now! My toes hurt.”

“That was one of the sexiest things I’ve ever seen. I loved it!” He supports her on the icy sidewalk, and then gives her a passionate kiss and a warm embrace. This is what love in pieces tastes like! Gosh.

“Let’s take a kiss selfie, Anna! Show me how.”

Click, click, click.

He’s looking hot – wearing her mother’s scarf and his elegant overcoat.

“You have the juciest lips, Anna! The best kisses I’ve had in all my life.”

“Awww. You do, too! I love your thin-thicks.”

They resume their walk.

 

Anna is happy.

© 2017 rf

 

 

Obs. Sighs. Happy, happy sighs!

 

 

Chapter 78 – The Student Prince

This blog is a book. Maybe better to read from the beginning? 🙂

 

Ein zwei drei vier
Lift your stein and drink your beer

Drink! Drink! Drink!
To eyes that are bright as stars when they’re shining on me!
Drink! Drink! Drink!
To lips that are red and sweet as the fruit on the tree!

Here’s a hope that those bright eyes will shine
Lovingly, longingly soon into mine!
May those lips that are red and sweet,
Tonight with joy my own lips meet!

Drink! Drink!
Let the toast start!
May young hearts never part!
Drink! Drink! Drink!
Let every true lover salute his sweetheart!

Drink! Drink! Drink!
To arms that are white and warm as a rose in the sun!
Drink! Drink! Drink!
To hearts that will love one, only when I am the one!
Here’s a hope that those soft arms will twine
Tenderly, trustingly soon around mine!

All I ask is the right to see those smiling eyes beguiling me
Drink! Drink!
Let the toast start!
May young hearts never part!
Drink! Drink! Drink!
Let every true lover salute his sweetheart!
Let’s drink!

 .
.
.
 
 .

Tuesday, 23 February 2016.

 

She visits her sister Sarah, for a late lunch with her niece and nephews, mom Riitta, and her teens Kristiina and Joey.

“Anna mamma, you are glowing,” says Kristiina, laughing and giving her a hug, “How did your date go? Was that Christian nice?”

“Oh, yes. Very!”  Anna smiles “In fact, I’m having my third dinner with him tonight. I’ll tell you a little more during the weekend, OK darling? What about you and Joey? How are your holidays going?”

 

Yes, Anna mamma, you are glowing, girl! She agrees as passes the entry hall mirror. So good to feel happy!

 

In the evening, Christian and Anna’s arms twine. They are cooling off, looking at the panoramic view from the sauna terraces on the eigth floor of her building, before going back in for more löyly.

“I missed you, Anna!”

“Oh, did you now? Already!??” their lips meet “I did too, Christian, but just a little bit.”

“Ouch,” he says slapping her bottom, “Is that so?”

“Ouch! Christian!!!”

 

It’s movie night now.

“Here are the Fiesta Salads you’ve ordered, Madame!” he says and then inquires, “What are we watching, Annita?”

“Thank you, sweet guy! Let’s eat as we watch The Student Prince? It’s another classic my dad taught me to love.” Oh! Dad, the pastor… Very genuine and strong in his faith. He’d have a heart attack if he knew I’m sleeping with the Englishman… Sigh. But I’m an adult now. I’ve gotta figure this out for myself.

“OK. What is the movie about?”

“Oh! It’s so beautiful, Christian. Such great music! You’ll like it.

“It’s about this prince called Karl, who is sent off to the university in Heidelberg to learn how to socialize. He makes friends there and falls for Kathie, the barmaid. The two are soul mates, but when the king is at his deathbed, he…”

“Don’t tell me the whole movie, Anna!”

“No. No spoilers. You’re right.” — she smiles heartily, poking his nose.

 

“I still can’t believe you had me go to MacDonald’s!! That’s it. Tomorrow I’m taking you on a proper date. Somewhere nicer. Gosh!”

“But the salad is delicious. You’ll see!”

 

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The movie starts. They eat, laugh and 🎶 drink the rest of the champagne. She sings along a little. They pause the movie to take the food away.

They chat, smile, laugh, hug, cuddle. It feels sooooo warm and nice. They play the movie again. They look at each other and start kissing passionately. Things heat up. They pause the movie for some loving. Then, he envelops her to chat a little more, while stroking and kissing her hair and her cheeks.

“I’m still hungry, Anna! Do you have anything light for dessert? Where are those grapes you keep promising, huh?”

“Oh, yes. We still haven’t had the grapes!”

 

They sit up on her bed and he mouthfeeds her, teasingly. Touching the cold fruit first against different parts of her hot skin. Mmmm. Looking at her adoringly.

Drink! Drink! Drink! To lips that are red and sweet as the fruit on the tree?! — She smiles at the thought.

 

After a while, he is asleep – the poor guy is still fighting his terrible cold – but Anna wants to finish watching the movie. She presses play.

She cries – alone – during the most emotional scenes. During the song I’ll Walk with God.

So beautiful!

A prince has a beautiful romance before he must choose between his country and his own happiness…? Noooo! So sad! I need to cry some more…

The next day Anna is looking thoughtful again and Christian asks her why.

“Oh, Christian. It’s the movie.”

 

“Oh? I fell asleep. Did you finish it? Naughty! I wanted to finish it with you.”

Giving up personal happiness for duty?

“Maybe it’s better that you didn’t. It’s so beautiful, and yet so sad!”

“It’s just a movie, Annita. Don’t be sad.” He hugs her.

© 2017 rf

 

 

Obs. Premonition? Please, no!

 

DRINKING SONG (aka DRINK, DRINK, DRINK)
From the Broadway Operetta "The Student Prince" (1924)
(Sigmund Romberg / Dorothy Donnelly)