Games – The Chronicles of a Happy Divorcée

Chapter 80 – Sad

This blog is a book. Maybe better to read from the beginning? 🙂

Thursday, 25 February 2016.

Anna has been her best self this week.

She felt appreciated for who she is.

She’s so happy, my friends! Every woman deserves that…

Chris and Annita got to see a few different sides of each other, and now she wants to keep exploring what they have got in store. The best of what life has got to give? Slowly, no rush.

Time flies.

13:54 Just taking off. Thanks so much for taking me to airport. And for a magical week. I can’t wait to see you again soon. Enjoy the rest of your holidays and speak soon. Think of me when you eat your grapes. 😊

Instead of answering his message, she calls her best friend Lisa to tell her about her spring break.

“And ohhhh, Lisa. It was so fun! I felt so relaxed. You know how hard-working I am, right? Always doing something in the house and at work – a thousand projects for me and for others…

“But this week a miracle happened. I just stopped everything. I just enjoyed myself. I even sat on the sofa a few times, can you imagine that? Christian made me stop all the rush. Naturally. Just like that.”

“Seriously? Is that even possible?”

“Awww. He called our week magical. And yes, that’s the best way to describe it. It was magical!”

“Really?” — Liisa giggles — “Tell me more!”

“Gosh, I feel I’m like I’m 20 years old again! I had free time, dates. I was treated with courtesy and good mood. English manners are super sexy. All these hugs, this affection. Pure joy!

“I felt important, Lisa. Well, I certainly retributed. He earned it…

“Why did I stay in the marriage that long? Tell me, am I just dreaming now? Do tell me!”

“I’m so excited for you, Anna!”

“Thanks, Lisa. And thank you, Tinder.” — Ding! — “Hey, Christian is texting me now. Haha.”

17:11 I made it. Fell asleep and the passenger beside me woke me up after landing. Must have thought I died.

“Wait… Lisa, he is trying to call me on WhatsApp now. Can I call you back?”

Anna takes Christian’s call.

“Hello,” she says sweetly.

“Hi.” — there’s laughter in his voice — “It’s only me. I’ve just landed. I miss you so much that I had to hear your voice again,” he says with longing.

“That’s awesome. I miss you, too.” — smiles.

She texts him immediately after they hang up.

My pleasure taking you to the airport. That way I got to touch and kiss you a little more. 😊

I have some nice plans for tonight, starting with a long nap soon… I’ll miss your ears, Chris. And how you love sleeping! I’ll miss trying to wake you up.

She sends him the pics of their last date at Gringos Locos and Töölö Bay. Especially their kiss selfie.

Mmm, couldn’t stop biting your tongue. Totally irresistible. 😊 I miss you. Xx.

Anna, thanks for the pics. I’m feeling quite sad to have left you there. ☹️

I saw my son. Glad he remembers me. Hope you will wear my t-shirt tonight. Where are you sleeping? Sofa? Floor? Bed? Chair? I will imagine you next to me. And I’ll be back. 😊

There are still so many games for us to play, Christian. And I can’t believe it you beat me in some! I want my revenge. More movies, forests, walks, hugs. Would love to show you many nice places. My favorites. We also need to try out other kinds of saunas. You’re sweet! 😊

In the next few weeks (well, months), they’ll be chatting more avidly than ever. There will be frequent visits, mind-blowing dates, hot getaways, more and more unforgettable texts, precious voice messages, movie nights, novel games, new tricks for old dogs…

Sharing, dreaming, touching, growing fond of, having fun, feeling inspired, challenging one another, missing, praying, trusting, believing, questioning and way too many crises, too. Eurgh. They’ll take the good with the bad. Grateful. Appreciative. Sometimes feeling sadness and doubt. Hopeful.

And then… hmmm.

But, who knows what tomorrow will bring?? One day at a time. No rush.

Obs. Missing him soooo very much!

Chapter 79 – Gringos

This blog is a book. Maybe better to read from the beginning? 🙂

Wednesday, 24 February 2016.

That week, when they’re apart for his work calls and her visit with relatives, they text each other.

Christian, what an adorable place you have in Spain! I looked at the link you sent me. Happy for you. Now I’m ashamed of my lack of space. Though very grateful with the life I’ve got. So many have so much less than me…

Oh! Spain was my home for a long time. I miss the fireplace, most of all. And the quiet. Your place is lovely, Anna. It’s all about maximizing space.

Yes! I make the most out of it. Keeping organized. And as long as my home is filled with love, the bills are paid, there’s healthy food and I can give my teens the occasional treat, I’m more than satisfied.

Trust me. You are doing an amazing job.

What kids want the most is attention, anyway.

Your children are lucky. And I can see you have lots of interest, passion and energy. I’m sure your ex is a good dad, as well.

Yes, he is. And thanks, I really do. I just need to heal my feelings a bit.

It’s always intense, their back and forth interaction.

Their holidays together just keep getting better. More fun! They play short, strategic board games with lots of competitiveness – Ticket to Ride, Nexus, Ingenious. They laugh, watch more movies and then there’s all that crazy-sweet loving.

They’re chatting in the shower now, getting ready to go out. This will be their last night together.

This week!

“Yeah Chris, I know myself and what I dream of. I don’t want to live alone forever – of course not. But it would be crazy to be in a hurry, after a 20-year-long marriage behind me. I’ve gotta be wise.”

“But maybe in a year? Maybe then? I understand you, Anna, and need time, too.”

“Maybe one. Maybe two. Hopefully not more! Then my teens will have been raised.” Is he just curious? It’s interesting that he is bringing up this topic already. I must have made quite an impression, then. Cool.

“I think you like me, Chris!”

“OMG, you are fantastic, Anna. You are the whole package. The whole package! Really! I’m amazed.”

“You are? I am? How come?!” — She smiles happily.

“Oh, Annita. You’re organized, hard-working, fun, sweet, smart.”

“Mm, what else? Keep it coming.”

“And so beautiful, sexy girl!” — He pinches her cheeks.

I am?! — “Of course I am, Chris. And you’re not bad either.”

Yesterday, he took her out on dates to Stones – for a quick happy hour – and then to Vapiano, near Stockmann. Vapiano was quite boring and she almost left, because he was very late in coming to meet her there. Humpf. A bunch of business calls for his start-up and such. He apologized, of course, but hmm.

Now it’s his last night in Helsinki, and “I want to make it special, Anna. No phones, no hurry. Choose one of your favorite places and I’ll take you there!”

“Gringos Locos it is, then!” — with delicious food and an authentic feel — “They have such cool decorations, Chris. With real ponchos and sombreros from Mexico. It’s not a franchise, you know… Joey and Kristiina love the place, too!”

(Later in 2017, Gringos is shut down and a new restaurant called Hooks is opened in the same location. Haha. Must be destiny, but Anna hasn’t been there yet…)

The winter air is crisp and dry, as Christian and Anna walk the 4 km to their last date night this week, stopping to take some pictures of each other by the Töölö Bay. And kiss, of course. Great memories!

They’ve joked and had a chat with the cute, tattooed waiter – they’ve eaten the marvelous entrecôte – and now they are sitting there, just smiling and looking at each other. Not a care in the world.

“Anna, your teeth are so white! I like your fashion sense, but I love your happy smile. Really, how can your teeth be this white?”

“Haha. I think you’re just comparing them to heavy tea-drinkers’ teeth, English guy. Mine are just normal…”

“No. They’re really white!”

“You’re funny, Chris!” — First time a date has praised my pearly whites. Haha! — “Btw, I like the shirt you’re wearing tonight, lover boy!” — She smiles looking into his vulnerable, beautiful eyes. His gaze says a thousand things his mouth won’t utter. — “I’ve had a happy week, Christian. Thank you for all these dates!”

“Thank you, Anna. I never knew whether you’d want to see me again.” — His voice sounds vulnerable, too! — “The same mystery every afternoon! You were always plotting, huh………?” — Silence.

He looks at her with a quizzed look on his face. — “Will you want to see me again when I come back?”

She hasn’t been plotting – no!

She has simply been wondering about him and his life, because I can already tell I like this charming guy.

What is he looking for, really? What can I become to him eventually? What’s the potential? I just want a boyfriend for now – is that too much to ask in life?

That’s it – a bf.

And this week has surpassed my expectations…

“There you go plotting again! With The Look!” — He protests jokingly.

“Chris… I just want to share the simple good things in life with someone special. Nothing mysterious there. Good movies. Games. Sports. Loving. Friendship. Trips… Hmm. Are you special, Christian? Hmm. Let me see… Ah, maybe you’ll do.” — She teases him, laughing affectionately. — “Yes! I want to see you again.” — pause — “But do enjoy your son in Berlin, in the meanwhile.” — In that feminine voice she’s growing used to now.

“Phew! In that case, I’ll be back with you soon, Annita!” — He is a natural sweetie, isn’t he?

And… She’s getting a serious crush. Is he really coming back??

I’ll just have to wait and see. Guys have to do their part. My bf will!

Hand in hand they take the walk back home from Gringos.

Something has been bugging her for 2 km, so they have to stop.

She holds onto him with one arm, takes off her right boot and rolls down her hold-up pantyhose that has ripped and is hurting her toes.

“Are you going to repeat that naked-outside-wearing-just-your-overcoat-and boots drill, Annita?”

“Haha. No. That was spontaneous… You know I had to change the parking meter fast, don’t tease me now! My toes hurt.”

“That was one of the sexiest things I’ve ever seen. I loved it!” He supports her on the icy sidewalk, and then gives her a passionate kiss and a warm embrace. This is what love in pieces tastes like! Gosh.

“Let’s take a kiss selfie, Anna! Show me how.”

Click, click, click.

He’s looking hot – wearing her mother’s scarf and his elegant overcoat.

“You have the juciest lips, Anna! The best kisses I’ve had in all my life.”

“Awww. You do, too! I love your thin-thicks.”

They resume their walk.

Anna is happy.

Obs. Sighs. Happy, happy sighs!

Chapter 76 – The Day After

This blog is a book. Maybe better to read from the beginning? 🙂

Monday, 22 February 2016.

A Little Dark Cloud?

Anna and Christian’s first date and night together turned out to be surprisingly special. So much so that she spent the morning smiling – and writing about it in her diary. Now, he is back at his hotel for work and Anna is taking a nap.

13:52 I’m wondering if there are any games that you have that I know… and to which you can’t make up arbitrary rules!! 😊

14:28 Hi Chris.

Hey. Sorry I gave you a late night.

It was fun!

For me, too.

14:32 Yes, let’s go play more games and watch a movie? I’ll beat you!

In the games…

Haha. Only because you don’t tell me the rules. Where is James Bond? Cute dog. Cute owner.

Lots of good things happening. Have made my business calls.

Getting a tattoo later.

Funny guy!

Anna approves of Christian and feels that there is some potential in this man…

She is on holiday – the sun is shining so bright! And ahhh to be free for the first time in my life! Ready for some loving and some action. Some TLC.

Nonetheless… why has life gotta have lows too, huh? Do you know when a little dark cloud comes out all of a sudden and overshadows your perfect sunshine?

After writing in her diary, she is feeling a little intrigued by something she read about Christian, as she googled him a little earlier. Hmmm. Anna, be smart!

Well, at least I’m going to have a good week.

Minimum.

His part is his job. To prove himself worthy of my trust and interest. But, what’s the hurry? Sometimes frogs become princes… We shall see.

Ops! What if a prince can turn out to be a frog, too??

His choice entirely!

At 4:30, Anna visits her sister and then goes to meet Christian at his hotel reception, as planned. This time the feverish Englishman is there. Sweet.

A nice kiss on the cheek and he says, “Hi pretty one! How was your day? How are you doing? I would have found your home this time. Believe me!”

“Well, I did not want to take the risk of you being two hours late. Again. Haha.”

“Oh, those things never happen twice with me. Don’t worry…

“Anna, I want to take you on a proper date tonight. My turn to treat you. Where do you want to go? Choose your venue!”

“Oh! That’s nice, Christian. Hey… why don’t we make it practical tonight? We are planning on watching a movie and playing a game later, aren’t we? So, instead of going to the city center, let’s have a pizza near my home? Then you can come and give the nurse here a proper visit, Mr. Englishman With A Bad Cold!”

“Sounds like a plan to me. Let’s do that.” — he smiles with warm eyes.

They walk down towards Ruoholahti without holding hands. He is looking nice, smartly dressed, and she is showing him places and sharing little stories about the neighborhood as they walk to Pizzeria Daka by the canal. The place is not fancy at all, but the pizza there is delicious, in Anna’s opinion.

They sit opposite each other. She doesn’t really like the style of his blazer – hmm, it makes him look older – but she does like him…

“Anna, how has your day been? Tell me all about it.”

“Oh, good. Saw my sister, took a nap, wrote a little…”

“Wrote? To your other Tinder matches, huh?”

“No. This week is all yours. Haha. Maybe! Hmmm… Just in my diary.”

Anna is a little serious, more quiet than usual. She’s thinking. A lot.

“I had a great time yesterday, Anna. Thank you for a wonderful dinner.”

“Oh, me too. Thanks for the champagne, Christian! Nice to finally meet you.” — she smiles.

“You are so thoughtful. I hadn’t realized you had that serious side. It looks like you’re plotting!”

“No! everything is OK. I’m just thinking.”

“About what? Would you tell me?”

“Ah, not yet. Someday. Just some things… Never mind. I’ll tell you later.”

“Phew. Good. You are giving me The Look!”

“Yes, I am. But for now, you’ll just have to wonder what it means.” — she laughs, feeling more relaxed.

And he is nodding really quickly. Awww.

“Chris, I love your nodding! Has anyone told you how cute you are when you nod fast?”

“My nodding!?”

“Yes. Have none of your girlfriends told you that?”

“No. That’s hilarious! Must be a Finnish thing.”

“Yeah. It’s adorable! Crazy ladies didn’t tell you.”

“You are the first… Anna, when I like someone, I nod.” — he looks at her affectionately.

During dinner yesterday, Anna had asked him how many serious relationships he had had. He’d gotten married around the age of forty, after all, and then separated three years later, so she wanted to check – lightly – about him possibly being an eternal bachelor.

“Btw, I counted today. I have had 14 girlfriends.”

“14?? That’s a lot!!”

“Well, I had about twenty years for that… Working in the Karoo desert for fourteen… It wasn’t easy to find a wife there. Guess I was just waiting for the right person… Until I grew tired of the whole place. Tired of waiting. I missed Germany! All my friends had families and kids. I went on many dates, met a nice person and proposed after six weeks. Crazy! Everything happened so fast.” — He comments on the story he’s told her before. — “The rest is history. But I’ve never had a shy girlfriend. All crazy!”

“What about me? Am I shy? Am I crazy?” — Anna wants to know.

“You are not shy at all! Crazy…? Hmmm. I am leaning. You do have a wild side.”

“Yes, but I am shy at first. Reserved. But not about being honest. I love honesty… Honesty with love…! Still, it’s good to be the more quiet one for a change. I get to be thoughtful!” — She teases him. — “I get to plot!”

“Hope you’re not plotting your escape!?”

“No……” — She’s laughing now.

“Do guys normally dominate the conversation, Anna? I like to listen. Then be silly. Then serious later.”

“Most guys I know are more quiet than me.”

“Am I quiet? I’m a bit sick. Scared to talk with my girlie voice!!”

“Haha. Don’t worry. It’s funny. Besides, I like playing nurse.”

“And I like to hear you talk.”

Score!

Anna believes a guy should always listen to the woman a little more than talk himself. I want them to see my heart!

“I’m glad that you like to listen, Chris. And happy you make me laugh.”

“Well… I haven’t really made you laugh yet! Laugh until you cry. Best medicine!”

“But you are the one in need of some of that, don’t you see?”

“Yes, Ms. Nurse.”

It wasn’t easy to lose a husband after twenty years. I like this guy so much already. What if I lose him, too? I don’t deserve that. Can I take more heartbreak already??

She gets more talkative now. They keep chatting and laughing as they have the pizza. Her mood is finally on the rise again.

“Did you like the drawing I made of you, Anna? Are you going to keep it on the wall?”

“Yes, of course! It’s so cool. Can we draw some more tonight, Chris? Please?”

“OK.”

“I think I’m gonna draw on your back. More fun! You’re being a good distraction, Christian. I need that! And lots of hugs. Lots more.”

“Yes, you need more. I agree. Are you going to tattoo my back? You can draw the Brazilian flag there – with your nails!”

“We shall see what I come up with. Shall we go? Lots to do. The games are waiting, the movie, the tattoo.”

“Definitely. Let’s go, Anna.” — As he waits for the payment to go through, he puts his arm around her shoulders and kisses her head.

Now they are walking like that, his arm around her shoulders. Awww.

My God! This feels so nice! I’ve missed this! A lot. Just wanted to meet a warm, confident man. She thinks with her heart melting a little. Healing a little. Can this be? Can life be this sweet?? Really? I’m feeling very glad again right now.

“Anna, I liked the pizza, but tomorrow I’m going to take you on a proper date. This place was way too simple. Where do you want to go?”

They stop and kiss affectionately, while good expectations for the night float in the cold wintry air around the canal.

Obs. Any red flags? Maybe not. Besides, I’m not perfect either. And healing feels soooo good!! Oh, let me heal fully. Let me just dive all the way in!

Chapter 75 – OMG, Diary!!

This blog is a book. Maybe better to read from the beginning? 🙂

Monday, 22 February 2016.

OMG, Diary!!

There’s so much to write that I don’t know where to begin!

Why don’t I just tell you the latest? 😊

After a kind of rough and a slow start – so much so that I almost quit before date #16 had even begun………………….

Yesterday… 😬

Uh-oh.

Just kidding. 😊

……………..Last night turned out to be amazing. Full stop. 😍

Period.

Not telling you anymore.

Just teasing you, haha. I’ll tell you everything. 😊😊

How can it have exceeded my expectations, tell me? Does this mean that we can’t judge people and situations too quickly, and that if we give them a chance they will step up and potentially show themselves to be wonderful? Awww.

Is Christian wonderful???

I don’t know yet – I just had a taste…

…But I know how he felt. 😍😍

😊😊😊 Girls go awww. And guys go mmmm.

They say you’ve gotta take things slow, live each day in the here and now, layer by layer, wait and see, seize the moment (Oh gosh, I did!!! I seized every single one of those butterflies…), appreciate the journey, enjoy the ride.

And I will.

I promise.

Having trust, hope and faith is also important. One day at a time.

And, and, and… being “as shrewd as snakes 🐍 and as innocent as doves 🕊️.”

That’s a good one, J!

Patience.

Oh my! I’m calm, but patience has always been the hardest for me. I want everything now!

When I was a little girl, whenever people told me their plans or ideas, dad says I always immediately went like “Hoje?”

Today?

“Anna, we’re moving to America!”

“Hoje?”

“Santa Claus is coming!”

“Today?”

“Let’s buy a bunk bed!”

“Hoje?”

“Sleepover with cousins soon.”

“Today?”

Haha. I’m still like that…

But oh, do tell me, isn’t life to be lived today?

At my age I know it is.

Today!! As if there’s no tomorrow.

Who knows if there will be a tomorrow?

Oh! I want a tomorrow, too! I want many, many tomorrows. Many awesome ones – just like yesterday…

…Today!! 😍😍😍

Move it, move it! Give it to me.

Nowadays, I am more patient: I want things yesterday.

Ohhhh, OH…

Ohhhh, yesterday I got everything I wanted from a good date. I finally did.

And it was the whole package: scorching sweet, affectionate, heart-warming, electrifying, blazing f-hot. The OH in Ohio 😊😊😊.

Ohhhh…….. Are you happy for me?

😊😊😊😊😊😊😊 (There, seven is the number of perfection).

That first moment we met in front of Kaisla – despite the suspicious butterflies in my stomach – I immediately liked Christian’s looks.

His height, his built. His mystery.

His voice. Oh God, his voice is approved – I can’t quite describe it, sorry. Manly, pleasant. Ohhh, like candy to the ears.

Christian looked confident, but not arrogant at all – and this same vibe perpetuated throughout the 12 hours we spent together. 😊

As we were walking to my flat, my attraction gradually intensified.

Slowly. 🎼 É devagar, é devagar, é devagar, é devagar, devagarinho. 🎶

With every step.

I was also feeling confident (like on most of my dates) and happy…

…But I kept the mystery – of course. 😊 Playing it cool and warm. Cool, but warm!

Hmmm. Still a little unsure about him being so late. What??

Dinner went fine (he looked a little shy), and his mysterious lack of flirting actually ignited my own wish to score, to hope to win him over, strangely enough 😆.

He was such a gentleman, and smart, interesting. I enjoyed the way it felt easy and so natural to be around him.

The games were fun, the electric tension between us just growing. Despite the atishoos. Haha. Quite endearing, tbh 😊😊.

The champagne, his joy to be there with me, celebrate me – him – us!

The aliveness. Oh – the chemistry.

And then!

GOD.

That first kiss!

His words. The intensity of the desire, all that mounted up expectation. The intensity of our gazes, eye to eye. Deep. The yearning…

With the touch of his lips all my doubts dissipated, melted, flew out the window. Mmmm. Clothes flew out the window, too. But not the hold ups. Haha.

Christian is a handsome man – to me 👌. His lips are very thin, but surprisingly thick on the inside 😂.

Not kidding. They are!

Oh, and so delicious.

I just loved his taste, his touch, the way he made me feel. The way I saw I made him feel.

I loved his skin, his smell. His natural smell just felt so right. The sounds of the night, mighty, wondrous. His words to me.

Taste, sight, touch, smell, and hearing – the whole package. Is that why making out is so fantastic??

Oh, yeah. He solved the tattoo mystery 😊. He was so good…

I went to the bathroom – I think I floated – and when I came back, he smiled. Arms open wide.

Seriously.

Such a perfect embrace!

“Gosh, it’s 4 a.m. You’re not going to send me back to the hotel at this time, are you?”

“No, you have a cold! Stay here.”

My bed is only 80 cm wide, and I suggested making another bed for myself.

“No!” he said, “That’s ridiculous. No way! Let’s just sleep here together.“

“Seriously? We won’t fit.”

“Of course we will. Just cuddle up, I’ll hold you all night long.“

That was the first night his triceps brachii was my pillow, as I was enveloped by both his arms in a perfect fit.

(Enveloped is a word he taught me, btw).

Now I’m alone, that’s why I’m writing. He has some business to take care of, so he went back to his hotel. But we are going to be together again. Of course we are!

Ding!

12:35 Thank you for a wonderful night. And for coming to my rescue. That should be my job!! 😊

I found the hotel! Easy in daytime.

Oh, I have some more things to write, so Christian can wait.

I swear I tried to sleep with him all night, but his body was burning hot. Such a fever – I just couldn’t – so I opened the mattresses I keep under the bed and slept there. In the morning, he told me he thought I had fallen dead, since I didn’t move or make a sound.

Sure I died. Died of pleasure. Overheated, too.

Hey, now I’m feeling tired! Exhausted – I need a nap. Getting back my energy to meet him later.

While Anna sleeps without texting him back, Christian writes again.

13:52 My business calls went well. Meeting partners in China in the coming weeks.

Thanks so much for the scarf. Your mom will be rewarded… with all the PG tips she can drink! 😊

I’m wondering if there are any games you have that I know and for which you can’t make up arbitrary rules!! 😊

14:28 Hi Chris

Hey. How are you? Sorry I gave you a late night.

It was fun!

For me too.

Yes. Let’s play more games. Watch a movie? I’ll beat you.

Haha. Only because you don’t tell me the rules. What’s the next game?

Ingenious…

P.S.

We’ve only just met and I have no idea what will happen from now on.

How much he liked me – if we will feel good about each other after a week… I just told you how it felt last night. I know the tension mounted up in three weeks… So, last night we reached a peak we both had fought for. Rewarding.

Amazing.

Matt Boggs says that people should take it slow when they first meet, since even the most wonderful people have a litte monster within. It’s good to wait, hang out a lot, until you get introduced to that little devil to see if it’s one you can live with.

Makes sense. Let’s see what happens.

But for now, who cares about the monsters? I’m gonna make the most out of my week, because I am on holiday and gloriously happy TODAY!

Hoje.

Obs. Hoy.

Don’t watch this if you’re sensitive.

Chapter 66 – 24 Hours

This blog is a book. Maybe better to read from the beginning? 🙂

Saturday, 20 February 2016.

Ending Day 62

21:03 Hello! Hope you’ve had a great day. I’m just packing, so will be there in just over 24 hours! 😊 Can’t wait to see you. Early night tonight…
.

God, this guy is something else. Well-mannered and endearing. Communicative! Seems normal/wonderful. Hopefully as nice as I expect.

.
Last night was pretty bad. Taxi arrives 11am tomorrow.
My forecast says snow in Helsinki. 🌨️

21:39 Hi Chris,
Yes, an interesting day! Just coming home. After leaving James Bond at home, I decided to drop by a friend’s farewell party. Some Brazilian football players hit on me. Haha! I know the type…

I left quite fast after that because a couple of women started fighting!
But the young woman who is moving back to Brazil is lovely. She’s the one who introduced me to Tinder, so I’m grateful. 😊

Had to go thank her, hug her good-bye and buy some of her wonderful feijoada, a national Brazilian dish. Have you ever tried it?

21:49 Home now to finish tidying up for a prince who’s coming over tomorrow. 😊 Can’t wait. I’ve heard he’s handsome, sweet, friendly and very witty. I’m hoping he’s hot, too. I think he’s a good person. That’s the main thing I can hope for.

Hmm. You’re probably sleeping to have energy for tomorrow, right? Just like Sleeping Beauty. Gosh! Wonder how many dragons and thorny bushes I’ll have to fight to get to you and possibly give you a wake up kiss!

See you in 22h! Tervetuloa vaan!

21:55 Hello! More cleaning and tidying? No more waxing though, right? 😊 Awake. Planning a full night’s sleep.

Fighting!!? What was that all about?? Glad you made your escape. 😊

22:05 😊 So, I’ll go and pick you up at your hotel at 8:15 tomorrow evening.

Perfect. I’ll let you know if there are any delays.

Delays, yay! You know how women can always use some extra time in front of the mirror: selfies, waxing and such.

Haha. Sounds intriguing! 😊 Just finishing packing.

Nice! Have a safe trip!

Thanks. I’m coming alone this time. Did I tell you that?

No.

Maybe business meetings just for one day. CEO/partner decided to postpone his trip to Finland to March. 😊

Got my Karoo desert haircut today. 😊 Just for you!

22:31 😊😊 Good style!

Yes! Bald men should always trim their hair short. At least the younger ones.

Btw, is your business meeting on Wednesday? I have an appointment at 1 pm and another from 4:30-6. Maybe could do something with the kids at lunch time. And then I’ll be free again at night.

23:41 Yes, it is. Glad you are spending time with kids. 😊

Ah… Tattoo mystery soon to be solved! Have you always liked tattoos? How many do you have?

Oh! Haha. I got my first tattoo to cover a surgical scar. I had two difficult c-sections, especially the second. They sewed me up badly, so I had to get a corrective plastic surgery some years later. I was very pleased with the result and the better quality of life after that! That’s when Sarah, my sister, told me some people cover scars with tattoos.

It’s tough being a woman!!

I never ever thought I’d get a tattoo in my life. I wasn’t the kind. but I figured I preferred seeing a tattoo to a scar…

23:48 Great idea with that. 😊 Is it a snake?

No snakes!!! I’m still planning to get a third and last tattoo to cover another scar.

Well… you have a tattoo parlour in your neighbourhood. Remember the pic you sent me? Unorthodox Tattoo?

I have a few scars. We can compare them. 😊

Let’s compete!

I think you may win. But we shall see!

Haha. I’ve got 5!

Got 3.

😊 Hey, getting sleepy here, but movies and games waiting… Some good food! And wax strips if you need them.

Feel free to do your computer work this coming week, whenever you have to. Just let me know.

I should be pretty free. It’ll be like a holiday. 😊

OK. But still, I promise not to cage you up. I won’t use my dungeon this week! 😊 Good night.

Hahaha. But I want to see that! Is it down by the sauna?

Sweet dreams!

Obs. Day 62 of just being silly. And hoping! Never lose hope!

Chapter 59 – 3D

Thursday, 18 February 2016.

Day 60

Anna is on her way to work – alone – because the teachers who usually carpool with her have a shorter workday today. That gives her a whole hour to reflect, while she drives in the dark, heavy early morning rainstorm.

Hopes and dreams. Needs.

Frustrations and the hurt she’s determined to leave in the past.

Good things to look forward to!

Ah… how I’d love a boyfriend.

I feel young(ish) and pretty. So much affection to give! So much that could be shared. So very much I’d love to receive. And life is for sharing! We are social beings.

And I’m so passionate!!

I’ve been through too much to care for stuff. Materialism, shopping? Despicable. Meaningless bickerings? Wasting life?

And aren’t the best things for free, anyway?

Affection, embraces, kisses, caring, playfulness, chatting, loving, helping others. Smiling. Shedding emotional tears and other goodies.

With an equal.

Attraction, vulnerability, growth.

Interesting dates – fun!

Hilarious, sometimes – to say the least.

She finds that it’s been good to meet up as quickly as possible after matching on Tinder, and she’s been enjoying some pleasant interaction.

You see, when you’re just online, you start building up a mental picture of the other person in your head. Maybe you imagine a certain height, weight, voice, appearance and body language.

An imagined person based on words and a few 2D images.

It’s like when you’re reading a novel and deciding for yourself what the characters look like. And, more importantly, how their personality shines through.

Then comes the date and… even if you keep an open mind and heart, the longer you’ve imagined the person in a certain way… the more difficult it can be to make the shift from 2D to 3D.

Oh!

Tonight is date #14. With Aarne – the one scheduled three weeks ago, since he lives in Turku. Coming to visit his daughter and excited to meet me – he says.

Hmm. He’s 54.

Finnish.

Uh… I just wonder…

…if I’ll like Christian in person — Anna laughs.

She parks her car and reads the Englishman’s last messages again.

4:30 Sorry. Went to bed super early and now I can’t sleep. 😞 Still feeling ‘energised’?? 😊

🎼 I’ve got sunshine in a cloudy day… 🎶

9:21 Still feeling like that, yes. But at 4 I was fast asleep.

Glad that you wrote any way. 😊 How are you feeling today? Any coughing? Sore throat?

11:31 Morning. Feel much worse today. Cold is finally coming out. Throat feels better though. Nose will be raw by end of today.

Hope you’re having a nice day there.

Ah, is he really going to make it with his cold??

14:24 Oh, no!! Get well soon. I hope you can stay in bed all day today again. Maybe the salt helped with the throat?

Raw nose? Try lip balm around there a few times per day. Solves the problem.

Awful weather here. Raining hard. Would be perfect to be under covers with good company and watch a nice movie, drinking hot cocoa…

14:47 Eurgh. Struggling today. Glad I don’t have to be anywhere else. Raining? No!! Bring back the snow. ☃️ I like your ideas for spending a rainy day. 😊

15:00 😊 Maybe Monday?

15:01 OK. Hoping for rain in that case. 😊

Me, too!

🎼 When it’s cold outside I’ve got the month of May
Well I guess you’d say
What can make me feel this way? 🎶

Got hotel booked today. Staying at Radisson Blue Royal hotel until Tuesday.

15:24 Nice place! And walking distance to my flat. About 1 km downhill and you’re at my door. Maybe I could choose a restaurant between the hotel and my place, instead of Vapiano. Maybe Koti Pizza? Since you’re ill… So you won’t need to walk that much. What do you think?

15:41 That sounds like a great plan. 😊 And downhill too! Can I ski there??

Haha. You can try to ski there. I’ll watch. It’ll be funny!

During the week, we could have some wonderful veggie soup at my place. Would be good for your cold, too!

Meeting up at 8 or 8:30?

If you could meet me at hotel around 2015 that would be great. I’m still not that familiar with Helsinki….but improving. This is my 4th trip. 5th in March. 😊

Nice!

Let’s do that. Should be there by then.

If the flight is late – snow storm or something – I’m sure we’ll manage to find some other place open.

Healthy pizza sounds great. And your soup. 😊 Want to try that. I won’t let you starve and hope to take you out a few times.

16:22 So we have ourselves a plan. 😊 Oh, I eat very little nowadays. Can survive with 4-6 eggs and I’m happy.

16:24 You should keep chickens!!

Soup, salads, eggs. Volleyball. Not much more that I need. Except a little loving.

That’s good exercise too. 😊 Miss that.

Blink slowly at me with those dreamy eyelashes of yours… And that voice. Maybe I won’t be able to resist. Not sure. Who knows??

Hmmm. I’m just coming out of a long long relationship. So no hurry.

Christian… Should I maybe tell you something?

I’m not really the wild kind. My values are important to me. Having said that… I’d love to get to know someone slowly. Find a boyfriend. Someone to enjoy life with, respect, spend time with whenever possible. Have my person out there!

I read something that makes sense. Something I’ve experienced in life, and it was totally worth it. Even though it ended… ☹️

“I want my eroticism mixed with love. And deep love one does not often experience… You do not know what you are missing by your microscopic examination of sexual activity to the exclusion of aspects which are fuel that ignites it. Intellectual, imaginative, romantic, emotional. This is what gives sex its surprising textures, its subtle transformations, its aphrodisiac elements. You are shrinking your world of sensations. You are withering it, starving it, draining its blood.” And… “Whenever you do something that is not aligned with the yearning or your soul — you create suffering.”

16:58 I’m quoting Anais Nin. Ever heard of her? Beautiful!

I’ve had it and hope to again. Someday!

How do you feel about this? Are you looking for something completely different?

You seem to be a nice person. Friend? Boyfriend? Who knows? We have to meet first, spend some time together. Will there be any chemistry? Maybe.

But I like sincerity and I think you do, too. When there’s honesty, people can make informed decisions and be on the same page.

Would love to hear your thoughts. A little now and more later.

17:14 Thought-provoking quotes there. I haven’t seen them before. To start with, friendship is so important for me – hopefully much more, but it takes a lot of time to get to know people.

Somehow, I can sense that you are such a good person!

I had some bad people in my life. It was only recently I decided to cut my ties. There are too many nice people in the world go bother with the bad ones.

I love what you write. So… looking forward to Sunday. Hope you won’t be disappointed. Either way, we’ll have a fun evening. And some good food and laughs.

🎼 Hey hey hey
Hey hey hey
Ooh yeah 🎶.

And… You have to teach me ‘Hazel Eyes,’ Love Letter and Ingenious – all the games you told me about. You promised! 😊

17:23 You sound wise. Looking forward to Sunday!!

Fingers crossed for rain. 😊 Back in bed.

18:08 Good! You need that!

Can’t wait to feel well again. Btw, is my hotel close to station? I’m catching bus from airport.

The hotel is about 600m uphill from the station.

Ok. Hope I can make it uphill!! 😊 They need a chairlift.

You’re so funny! I wish I could pick you up, but it’s sauna time and the teens are coming over for that and then leaving.

Won’t have much luggage so should be easy. Oh. I would never expect that!!

Don’t want to miss the sauna.

Sauna is the right place for you.

🎼 I’ve got so much honey the bees envy me
I’ve got a sweeter song than the birds in the trees 🎶

But I would have loved picking you up. You would have been able to hear me singing in the car from moment zero.

Not necessary at all. But thanks.

18:13 No singing necessary for you then. LOL! 😊 Loved your suggestion of getting myself some chickens!

18:15 Meant the lift. Please sing away!! 😊

Look at my dinner.

Mmmm. Making me hungry.

I knew that you meant the lift. Was just teasing you a little.

You teasy-joker! 😊

Anna sends him another picture of her taking a nap. Under lots of covers.

Are you having another power nap?

No. Actually just eating those eggs.

OK. Thought you were multitasking. 😊

Teasing is kind of fun, too. I’m in an energetic mood all the time nowadays! Beware. I might grab you.

I was wondering where you were balancing the eggs. 😊 Grabbing? I like a bit of energy.

(Love how witty you are)! Just a bit? I heard you…

Haha. OK. A lot!!

🎼 Hey hey hey
Hey hey hey
Ooh yeah 🎶

So lucky to be on holidays from tomorrow afternoon. 😊 Hiihtoloma – our spring break – meant for skiing in Finland.

18:22 Enjoy! Holidays at last.

I’ve brought home some games for 2 from school. Some of my own, so that we’ll have enough to do in case of bad weather.

Great. 😊

Competitiveness and intelligence are big turn-ons!

18:30 So I have to win. What are the games?

Ha. You want to practice, huh? Ingenious. That’s one of the games. 😊 Ticket to Ride. 6 Nimmt.

I want to do my homework for the teacher.

The rules are in Finnish, so, too bad!

Haha. I see. I will just have to trust your teaching, then.

Are you going to sleep soon? Get your energy back for me.

Yep. Sleeping. But I’m thinking about your hazel eyes.

Sweet dreams… I’m going out soon.

Enjoy. I will be thinking about sauna games, as well.

You do that and try to come up with some cool rules. Talk to you later then, handsome eyes.

Sleep well later.

P.S. Three days!! X

Three days for you and me in 3D. 😊 Finally!

🎼 I don’t need no money, fortune, or fame (ooh hey hey hey)
I’ve got all the riches baby one man can claim (oh yes I do) 🎶

Obs. All names have been changed, and chat messages were published with the match’s kind permission.

Obs. Day 60 – hey, hey, hey! 🎶

Chapter 4 – Well, Look at You Now

This blog is a book. Maybe better read from the beginning? 🙂

Tuesday, 5 January 2016.

Day 16

Ha! This is so amusing!

Not even in her wildest of dreams would Anna have imagined that someday she would be a divorced mother of teens, living alone two weeks a month and – above all – swiping left and right. Well, mostly left. 😏

Quem te viu e quem te vê.

If you don’t know what I’m talking about, that’s how the Tinder app works: you create an online profile through your Facebook account, after which you get to see pictures of other Tinder users, with or without a profile text.

In theory, when you see somebody you like, you swipe their picture to the right side of your smart phone. At this point, you may or may not have looked at their possible text/other pics. When you don’t ‘like’ the person, you swipe left.

Anna looks at everything before deciding which way to swipe.

If the person you swiped right to has also swiped you right, the two of you become a match and are now able to chat with each other. Genius!

If you as the reader are thinking “So what? No biggie with Tinder!” … that’s because you don’t know about Anna’s history well enough yet. For her, using Tinder is huge.

And remember she has been alone for only 16 days.

After a twenty-year-long marriage.

To top it up, Anna comes from a kind of, what shall we call it? A less worldly background. Granddaughter, daughter and ex-wife of pastors, to be precise. Anna herself has also worked for the same church in the past. And even though she does not consider herself ‘religious’, her faith is central to her – no doubt about it.

So, for her, it feels extremely exciting — and almost sinful — to be having a go on Tinder.

She thinks a lot about the profile text she wants to have there, before coming up with this:

Fun-loving, international (5 countries, 20 cities, 5 languages), half-Finnish/South American. Smart, artistic, sociable. A think-outside-the-box-hardworking-independent kind of teacher. Separated. Mom of teens. ❤️

Volleyball, jogging, working out. A healthy lifestyle and your inner beauty.

Please tell me you’re communicative and fun without alcohol – then it’s OK to drink a little. For me, God is love. Looking for new friends, but a cool guy once said, “life’s an adventure,” so you never know… 😊

(Later, she uncovers what her dates understand by “fun-loving” 😅🤣).

Anna never liked video games as a child, though she did play Atari a little bit. A decade ago, playing Tetris on the computer was super cool. It is just not the same on a touch screen, so bye-bye addiction.

She always says that the only video games she approves of have to start on the left of a TV screen and move only to the right. And up and down, of course. Super Mario was awesome to try out! But mostly, she just used to watch her younger brother Moses play it to its last phase, when they’d be really excited and celebrate!

Gosh, today’s games make her dizzy.

Joey, her son, loves playing Counter Strike and Grand Theft Auto. For Mr. Ex, Fifa was the way to go. Her mom Riitta was addicted to Candy Crush for a long time, but never spent a dime on it – quitting after she realized there would be no end to its 900+ phases.

Anna would never play with anyone’s feelings, but this Tinder “game” is fun! Real people in a real game?

What are they all doing there? What are they looking for? — She wonders mesmerized.

Wait.

What am I doing? What I am looking for??

Obs. Day 16 since moving out. New beginnings and some confusion.