Chapter 22 – Tinder Date #7

 

Tuesday, 2 February 2016. –> And we’re back to the past.

 

Day 44

 

Diary Dear,

My quest goes on in the treacherous seas of the Isle of Tinder-Cinders.

When I arrive at the Little Big Café, André is almost done munching his croissant and gulping away. I smile as I walk up to him. Holding up two fingers, he complains I’m 2 minutes late.

Cool guy.

He asks me if I’d like coffee and when I nod, he adds, “Go buy one then”.

Sweet.

His pics on Tinder are quite nice. Suit and all. How come he looks as though he went to bed in old clothes, got up, slipped his feet into no-lace boots, put on his oldest winter coat (nothing’s matching), and came to meet me on a bad hair day?

Whatever. I know I can just dump him, but humor him with me.

 If nothing else, stories to tell my grand-kids one day?

He then proceeds to chatter. 20 minutes on global warming. According to him, the firm he owns is building huge projects in Vantaa, but – he protests – what’s the use of it if all Africa is going to invade Europe by the millions?

Anyway, fifteen minutes, that’s it – no more (thank God), and we leave. His SUV is parked outside and he commands, “Get in the car. I’ll take you home now.”

I just bid him farewell/no thanks and know that I’ve had my first nutjob date.


 

Diary… Mom called from Tampere this afternoon to check up on me. I shared a little, mentioned Ex and Newbie’s Bahamas pics on FB. What a pain… but no comments. 

Rage. Sigh.

“Anna, I don’t understand how come you’re so calm. Why don’t you hate him?? It’s been really hard on us, your father and me.”

“Really, mom? I know…

“But, you’re the one who did all those daily devotionals with us kids. Reading the whole Bible, cover to cover. You had us memorize those verses about not judging others, loving your neighbor… Forgiving 70×7. Ring any bells?

“Remember the little song you made out of that verse for us to sing: ‘Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Yes do!’

“Your fault, mom. And…

Thanks.☺️” — I really am deeply grateful. Mom has always been incredible. A Rock and a steadfast friend.

“Yes, but…”

 

I change subjects and tell her the hot gossip. You know. Tinder, me. The whole concept had to be explained to her.

Her reaction? Out of the roof. Ha-ha. She wants updates. 😄

We agreed not to tell dad just yet. Don’t know if he’d understand…


 

As for other news… the teens are fine. With their father this week, so I have another date booked. 😆

#incorrigibleme

The guy looks good in his photos – like a Norwegian god. Bold smile. Blond, nicely trimmed beard. His pics are artistic, cropped to show only half his face.

His chats are a bit slow, though. IT engineer. Nokia.

Talking of which, the Englishman (Christian) has been writing avidly. As nicely as ever. Is he really visiting Finland this month, you think?

Ah, come on doubting Thomas… sooner or later I’ll have to score. I’ve got enough match cards up my sleeve. I just know it. 

Get me a winning ticket, will you? Please. God?

 

As hard as it is, people find love and passion every day. It’s been like this for centuries, I think. 🤔 Since the beginning of times, maybe? That’s just the nature of things. Love Actually. Love is in the air. Everywhere. 

If even Mr. Ex is happy with Ms. Newbie…

© 2017 rf

 

 

Obs. Day 44 since moving out.

Chapter 15 – Tinder Date #6

This blog is a book. Maybe better read from the beginning? 🙂

 

Saturday, 23 January 2016.

 

Day 34

 

So, Luukas and I text. 

How can we have this much in common?

He’s a teacher too – physics; his father is also a retired pastor; he’s divorced with adult kids; loves volleyball and running (well OK, he runs marathons – I struggle to jog 5km). He’s lived in Oulu, Jyväskylä, Porvoo and Stockholm, and like me, lives in Helsinki now. And more. 

He convinces Anna to call her up immediately. She’s intrigued and a phone call would be a first. Why not?

Oh, no! He sounds soooooo formal. And laughs exactly like Santa Claus, Ho, Ho, Ho. Anna, you are so adorable! Ho, Ho, Ho.”

Still, he seems like a good person. Plus, he’s in very good shape, in his really blurry pic. So Anna decides to accept his invitation to have tea the next evening.

 

Oh, Thank you, thank you. Ho, Ho. Where?”

🎅

She’s slowly started to feel that, when unsure, why go all the way to the other side of the center. Let them come to me.

She doesn’t tell him her neighborhood, of course, but suggests a gaming restaurant on Tyynenmerenkatu.

 

 

Day 35

 

On Sunday, after a pleasant day with a little jogging, she’s not feeling too excited, but still, when a human being gives you their precious commodity of time, the least you can do is get nicely groomed for the date and look as cute as possible. It’s a matter of respect.

Self-respect, mainly.

 

And what if he ends up being Mr. One, huh? I don’t ever want to regret not showing up looking good.

Nothing over the top. Just the usual.

Shower. Hair, light make up. A casual outfit. A nice overcoat and a beautiful, fashionable scarf.

A sincere smile, self-confidence and eye-to-eye contact are anyone’s most important accessories.

 


 

Evening has come, and Luukas walks up to her on the dark street, blond, tall, handsome and… shy! Poor dear.

The restaurant is closed, so change of plans, and they go to the Little Big Café inside Verkkokauppa.

Anna can’t remember anymore all the things they talked about that day. She does remember, however, that he was intelligent, timid, and…

… kept on talking about all the wrong topics.

 

(a) His upcoming unemployment and no stress in looking for another job.

Oh, my. His hair looks so oily. Didn’t he wash it for the date?

(b) His illnesses. The pain and discomfort.

This keeps getting better.

Hey, we all have our conditions, but please! Win me over with your talents, your confidence and your charm, first. Show me what all your good qualities are.

Slowly. No hurry. A little mystery is good.

 

Hey you Mr. Wanted out there: win me over and then I won’t mind your brokenness. I have my share, too.

Skills, people, dating skills!

 

I’m here practicing mine. Hmm.

OK, then I can stay a little longer and do this in peace. I’m not wasting my time. Phew.

Oh, poor-fit-marathon, dear. Good attributes, but why are you wearing a cheap, old-looking, hoodie? The color doesn’t suit you. It’s too small and has a couple of holes in it. It looks like a teenager’s hand-me-down. From last decade!

 

Btw, there’s a youTube relationship coach with good advice out there. Matt Boggs. Please, check him out. Respectable stuff.

Some of us need it more than others…

It’s not about positivism, but working to become a better version of yourself. It will take work, but you yourself will benefit the most.

 


 

Saturday, 30 January 2016.

 

A week later, Anna goes to the Educa Messu, an education fair for teachers. Guess who she bumps into there?

Yes, him.

He gets all happy and excited to see her and grabs her hand, pulling her to see different stands.

Walking hand in hand, she panics on the inside and is shocked into passiveness. Wide-eyed.

Akward! Does he think we’re on a date?? What if my teacher colleagues spot us like this? Some don’t even know I’ve separated yet. They’ll think I’ve found myself a teacher lover.

Help!

She has the idea to get deeply mesmerized by some pedagogical books opposite them, and thus has to let go of his hands to flip its many, many pages. Genius.

He finds ways of grabbing her hand again, so she repeats the trick.

He doesn’t take her hand in his again and she feels better.

 

Anna has been fasting today and is feeling quite weak. The fair is over and Luukas invites her to have a hamburger at Sävel in Kallio. They’re on the tram and she’s feeling so weak that she just goes there with him.

Just being friendly. And ravenous!

Besides, she’s told him he’s nice, “But sorry, I realized I’m not ready for a relationship or dating yet.”

 

They have a chat about work while they dig into their burgers. He’s OK. And he gulps his beers.

 

Then, after eating he brings his chair that has been safely opposite hers to her side of the table. What?

He hugs her and starts kissing her cheeks.

At a burger restaurant?? People are watching!

She shows him with her body language that she’s not interested, but he kisses her ear and whispers, “I’m a very passionate man! Must be my half-Russian blood!”

“Sorry! Stop! I’m not ready.”

“Oh, Anna, you’re simply wonderful.”

“Thanks, but no. Not ready yet. Thank you for your company. I’m feeling tired, so I’ll have to go now.”

 

They bump into other once more, when Anna is with Kristiina at Stadium in Kamppi. Anna introduces the two, and the three of them chat for a minute.

“Mom, he’s so handsome and nice!”

“Yes, he is. But he’s not for me.”

I’ll really have to do that research on how to politely let a man know I’m not interested.

Urgently!

© 2017 rf

 

 

Obs. He is nice, but there’s just no chemistry.