Chapter 69 – Tinder Date #16, Part Two

This blog is a book. Maybe better to read from the beginning? 🙂

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Sunday, 21 February 2016.

 

D-Evening

 

Anna’s spring break has started well.  🎼 I got out of bed on the right side, and I’m having a wonderful day. 🎶  Remember?

This is her first holiday week ever as a single adult woman, with no care in the world for eight more days. I’m gonna enjoy this as much as I can!

Anna is feeling happy and Christian surely plays a part in that.

Still can’t believe that crazy selfie he sent me, though.

Anna had insisted for days he send her a picture with a smile, teeth showing. She wanted to make sure Christian had teeth, what else? A nice smile is such a turn on, after all!

So, tonight she’s finally going to meet that very, very short, chubby, sixty-five-year-old jolly grandpa with a pink complexion, a forced smile and eyes wide open. Like one of Snow White’s little darlings. Bald, with a few long hairs sticking up his head against the backlight.

Not at all like in his other pics. Haha.

Clueless selfie. He’s such a guy!

Endearing. Some clueless guys are simply endearing.

 

Ding!

15:00   On my way. 😊 But I forgot to bring my scarf. Delayed flight. Will send you a message once I’m onboard. 😊

Yay! Looking forward to seeing you. Have a safe flight! 😊 About the cold, don’t worry, I’ll bring you one of my mom’s gift-project scarves.

Great. Thanks so much! 😊 What’s the best way to get the hotel?

 

She sends him detailed directions. Ha! It’s pretty straightforward. Isn’t he supposed to be a world traveller?! And Helsinki is so tiny!

 

15:50   Can always get lost. 😊 Can you leave a trail of breadcrumbs?

15:58   Funny guy! I’ll leave you a trail of smiles. If you get lost, text me and I’ll come and save you.

16:20   Will do. Just put me in your bicycle basket. 😊 Boarding soon. Take a power nap!

Of course I will!  😊

 

D-evening has now come and Anna’s ready to mingle. Yay!

She wanted to wear a skirt, but since it is 0°C outside, she’s chosen black slacks and a blue jeans shirt. Hold-ups underneath. High-heeled leather Army-style Vagabond boots on her feet, and to warm her up, a new navy Didriksson’s parka, her favorite scarf and matching gloves (she doesn’t like wearing hats – no).

Loose hair and a happy smile.

She is looking good and feeling awesome!

 

19:20   The eagle has landed. And can’t find his luggage!

 

Anna is just waiting around. Getting restless. I can’t wait any longer!! Can you?

20:10   Found my suitcase! And… I’m in Helsinki!!!! Heading for hotel. Will call you when I am there. 😊 Really, really nice to be back. And can’t wait to see you.

Tervetuloa! Xx 😊😊

 

Ohhh! I’m too excited to wait around the house.

She walks to Mr. Ex’s place, wishes the teens a good holiday – with big hugs – and borrows the dog for the walk up to the hotel.

 

There has been lots of subtle teasing from both lately. And from his side “cough, cough and splutter,” too.

A funny man…

…With a cold!

Where does he find the motivation to get up from bed and catch a flight? Haha – I did ask him if he wanted to postpone his trip, but no.

So, playing nurse on a date, am I?

 

20:15   I’m wearing my snow boots. Don’t want to break more bones!

Better safe than sorry. I’m wearing casual. Let’s match?

Yes! Don’t wear heels. 😊 Slippery out there.

 

Anna and James Bond take brisk steps through the Kolmiopuisto park, towards Kamppi. Cute doggie! It’s drizzling and dark, but who cares??

Soon, soon, soon!

Yes!

Christian has put in so much effort so far – like guys who know what they are doing in the dating game. I’ve been thoroughly enjoying his attention. She smiles, with a positive gut feeling about their encounter tonight.

I’m a single woman now – and my date is here.

Yay, yay, yay!!

 

20:49   OK. Almost ready. Will give you a call soon. 😊

 

Game on!!

She’s standing outside his hotel and can’t wait to see him…

Literally she looks at her watch 21:15? Seriously? Where is this guy??

© 2017 rf

 

 

Obs. D-Evening

(The snow is falling gracefully here in Tampere as I write this chapter, looking out the windows at the beautiful scenery of my parents’ backyard).

 

 

Chapter 15 – Tinder Date #6

This blog is a book. Maybe better read from the beginning? 🙂

 

Saturday, 23 January 2016.

 

Day 34

 

So, Luukas and I text. 

How can we have this much in common?

He’s a teacher too – physics; his father is also a retired pastor; he’s divorced with adult kids; loves volleyball and running (well OK, he runs marathons – I struggle to jog 5km). He’s lived in Oulu, Jyväskylä, Porvoo and Stockholm, and like me, lives in Helsinki now. And more. 

He convinces Anna to call her up immediately. She’s intrigued and a phone call would be a first. Why not?

Oh, no! He sounds soooooo formal. And laughs exactly like Santa Claus, Ho, Ho, Ho. Anna, you are so adorable! Ho, Ho, Ho.”

Still, he seems like a good person. Plus, he’s in very good shape, in his really blurry pic. So Anna decides to accept his invitation to have tea the next evening.

 

Oh, Thank you, thank you. Ho, Ho. Where?”

🎅

She’s slowly started to feel that, when unsure, why go all the way to the other side of the center. Let them come to me.

She doesn’t tell him her neighborhood, of course, but suggests a gaming restaurant on Tyynenmerenkatu.

 

 

Day 35

 

On Sunday, after a pleasant day with a little jogging, she’s not feeling too excited, but still, when a human being gives you their precious commodity of time, the least you can do is get nicely groomed for the date and look as cute as possible. It’s a matter of respect.

Self-respect, mainly.

 

And what if he ends up being Mr. One, huh? I don’t ever want to regret not showing up looking good.

Nothing over the top. Just the usual.

Shower. Hair, light make up. A casual outfit. A nice overcoat and a beautiful, fashionable scarf.

A sincere smile, self-confidence and eye-to-eye contact are anyone’s most important accessories.

 


 

Evening has come, and Luukas walks up to her on the dark street, blond, tall, handsome and… shy! Poor dear.

The restaurant is closed, so change of plans, and they go to the Little Big Café inside Verkkokauppa.

Anna can’t remember anymore all the things they talked about that day. She does remember, however, that he was intelligent, timid, and…

… kept on talking about all the wrong topics.

 

(a) His upcoming unemployment and no stress in looking for another job.

Oh, my. His hair looks so oily. Didn’t he wash it for the date?

(b) His illnesses. The pain and discomfort.

This keeps getting better.

Hey, we all have our conditions, but please! Win me over with your talents, your confidence and your charm, first. Show me what all your good qualities are.

Slowly. No hurry. A little mystery is good.

 

Hey you Mr. Wanted out there: win me over and then I won’t mind your brokenness. I have my share, too.

Skills, people, dating skills!

 

I’m here practicing mine. Hmm.

OK, then I can stay a little longer and do this in peace. I’m not wasting my time. Phew.

Oh, poor-fit-marathon, dear. Good attributes, but why are you wearing a cheap, old-looking, hoodie? The color doesn’t suit you. It’s too small and has a couple of holes in it. It looks like a teenager’s hand-me-down. From last decade!

 

Btw, there’s a youTube relationship coach with good advice out there. Matt Boggs. Please, check him out. Respectable stuff.

Some of us need it more than others…

It’s not about positivism, but working to become a better version of yourself. It will take work, but you yourself will benefit the most.

 


 

Saturday, 30 January 2016.

 

A week later, Anna goes to the Educa Messu, an education fair for teachers. Guess who she bumps into there?

Yes, him.

He gets all happy and excited to see her and grabs her hand, pulling her to see different stands.

Walking hand in hand, she panics on the inside and is shocked into passiveness. Wide-eyed.

Akward! Does he think we’re on a date?? What if my teacher colleagues spot us like this? Some don’t even know I’ve separated yet. They’ll think I’ve found myself a teacher lover.

Help!

She has the idea to get deeply mesmerized by some pedagogical books opposite them, and thus has to let go of his hands to flip its many, many pages. Genius.

He finds ways of grabbing her hand again, so she repeats the trick.

He doesn’t take her hand in his again and she feels better.

 

Anna has been fasting today and is feeling quite weak. The fair is over and Luukas invites her to have a hamburger at Sävel in Kallio. They’re on the tram and she’s feeling so weak that she just goes there with him.

Just being friendly. And ravenous!

Besides, she’s told him he’s nice, “But sorry, I realized I’m not ready for a relationship or dating yet.”

 

They have a chat about work while they dig into their burgers. He’s OK. And he gulps his beers.

 

Then, after eating he brings his chair that has been safely opposite hers to her side of the table. What?

He hugs her and starts kissing her cheeks.

At a burger restaurant?? People are watching!

She shows him with her body language that she’s not interested, but he kisses her ear and whispers, “I’m a very passionate man! Must be my half-Russian blood!”

“Sorry! Stop! I’m not ready.”

“Oh, Anna, you’re simply wonderful.”

“Thanks, but no. Not ready yet. Thank you for your company. I’m feeling tired, so I’ll have to go now.”

 

They bump into other once more, when Anna is with Kristiina at Stadium in Kamppi. Anna introduces the two, and the three of them chat for a minute.

“Mom, he’s so handsome and nice!”

“Yes, he is. But he’s not for me.”

I’ll really have to do that research on how to politely let a man know I’m not interested.

Urgently!

© 2017 rf

 

 

Obs. He is nice, but there’s just no chemistry.

 

 

Chapter 12 – Tinder Dates #2-5

This blog is a book. Maybe better read from the beginning? 🙂

 

Monday, 18 January 2016.

 

Days 29

 

Handsome Sami seems respectable. An older psychiatrist, that surely means he’s to be trusted, right?

Anna invites him over to her place for evening tea. It’s a spontaneous invitation. She’s not used to so much alone time and someone to talk to feels like a good idea.

He’s kind and well-mannered and they converse serenely about an array of different topics.

He says he thinks she’s beautiful, but also that he’s shy and doesn’t really know how to do relationships.

No sparks are flying. Yet, it feels interesting, though very, very strange to be serving tea alone to a new acquaintance at her place, with no one to answer to about it, for the very first time in her life.

No one who will even ask! Or know, unless I tell.

They hug lightly as they say good-bye at her door. They don’t even kiss and will never see each other again.

 


 

Tuesday, 19 January 2016.

 

Day 30

 

Aaro is a very fit psychologist/ masseur / ballroom dancer. By the look in one of the pictures, he must be really good at his dancing. Wow. A great smile with professional body language.

On the chat, he says he’s won prizes and really adores it all. 👍👍

They meet late in the evening – in a park – after an animated phone call. He looks excited, but has come straight from dance class and is smelling of old sweat in his bright green-pink skiing outfit.

OMG, what?? Seriously!?

As they talk, he bends and stretches in all possible ways. Anna is flabbergasted and starts feeling very sad.

He asks her about her recent separation and she starts crying. He switches on his psychologist mode and gives her good advice, while taking the liberty of rubbing her shoulders.

He thinks she’s crying over her separation, but honestly? She’s crying because she’s so disappointed at the date and is starting to feel lonely, longing for companionship.

It’s been a month and a half since I separated from Mr. Ex… Gosh! Will it be this hard to find a man I’ll be attracted to and have a boyfriend again??

Back home, she writes to thank him for the free appointment(s) before they say goodbye and unmatch. And hopes he’ll find himself a great dance partner.

 


 

Friday, 22 January 2016.

 

Days 33

 

This one doesn’t speak English, so they have to chat in Finnish.

After the Aaro experience, she’s been thinking, and tells Tapio she’s that people should give each other some clear feedback after dates, so they could improve themselves. apparently, he finds her whole idea of ratings hilarious.

He plays volleyball, Anna’s favorite sport, so she decides to give him a chance – despite the fact they’ll have to speak Finnish.

He wants a proper date. Would she like a picnic and a walk in the freezing February weather or a restaurant meal, he wonders. She chooses the dinner.

They meet in front of Tennispalatsi and walk down to the Nepalese restaurant by the Central Railway Station.

Oh! He’s nicely dressed!

With a ¾ black woolen overcoat that looks quite new, jeans and a casual shirt – Anna thinks it’s very sweet when guys put in the effort to do things nicely and give a good first impression!👍🥇 🤸‍ 🏆

Is that too much to ask?

They chat in Finnish as they walk to the restaurant.

By the time they sit to eat, however, she has already realized that there’ll be no chemistry between them, so she decides to order just a salad (more about that later – it’s a whole system she’s unknowingly developing).

 

He’s having a full course meal, which takes forever to eat, and inwardly, she’s getting impatient.

Gosh, this was a mistake! It’s so draining to try to date in Finnish and much less exciting.

So, as awful as it feels, she excuses herself to go powder her nose and there she texts Timo, another Tinder guy she’s been chatting with. 🤥

Timo told her earlier that he was going to be at the Finnkino cinema nearby tonight, so after asking him if his movie was any good, she suggests they meet up for a drink in an hour.

Yeah, sure, I could have a drink! 😀

 

Back at their table, nice Tapio wants to pay and won’t take no for an answer. She feels bad. 🤦‍

Then, he insists on walking her back to her bike, parked by Tennispalatsi in the upper part of Kamppi.

After they hug good-bye, he doesn’t release her, but instead steals a little gentlemanly kiss on the mouth, to her great surprise!

He asks if she still wants to hang out some more, and she lies that she’s feeling a bit tired.

“Bye-bye. Let’s chat later and thank you very much for the date!”

Anna waits and then carefully cycles back down to Casa Largo, near the Railway Station. She doesn’t want to hurt Tapio’s feelings, but there was just no attraction and she doesn’t know how to tell someone that, on the spot.

Hmm, another Google research coming up!

 

The next day, when Tapio cutely asks for his feedback, she messages him:

+ You were really sweet

+ Well dressed

+ Walked me back to my bike like a true gentleman

+ Gave me a proper date (my first dinner date ever) and even insisted on paying for it (thank you!)

 

– You don’t like to speak English

– I get tired speaking Finnish in my free time

– I don’t feel we have enough things in common

 

He thanks her, amused.

You really are a teacher!! 😂

 

They never unmatch on the app and mention that perhaps they’ll end up playing volleyball together, someday.

 


 

Still Friday.

 

Timo is waiting for Anna on the second floor of Casa Largo. Anna is feeling a bit naughty.

He’s having tea at the bar, as she sits next to him. It is his tea-total month, he explains.

He works for the Parliament and his English is amazing. Timo’s just a little taller than Anna, probably around 1,68 or so. But personality-wise he’s a big man, very fun, making her laugh a lot.

After half an hour of lively talk, it occurs to her that is she’s having a great time.

His eyes shine like a little boy’s as he talks in this fast and furious pace about events, museums, galleries, festive parties and all the people and places he knows around the center of Helsinki. He seems to be passionate about his work, friends, art, his teens, traveling, etc.

He tells her about an art history course he’s taking at the Atheneum. He likes traveling abroad, but says that in Finland anywhere outside the city center feels too far for him.

Anna, on the other hand, loves the Finnish countryside and tries hard to stay away from organized events, concerts and fixed programs. This won’t work!

 

He says he knows for a fact that he never ever wants to get married again, because he loves being a bachelor. Hmm. He seems to have had a great time, too, and they say good night with a surprisingly warm, firm hug outside the restaurant, agreeing to see each other again sometime soon.

Back at home, she realizes she’s feeling very thirsty.

Ha! He didn’t even ask if I wanted to go get my own tea. What?

He texts her on and off, not really asking Anna anything about her life. He just sends her pics of his events, expositions and trips. She thinks he’s friendly – but finds this kind of interaction really strange.

He’s not trying to get to know me better at all!

A few weeks later, he writes.

We should meet up, Anna!

 

By then it is too late. Anna’s got a massive, heart-warming crush on Tinder Date #16. 😍

© 2017 rf

 

 

Obs. Day 29-33 since moving out. What now?