Suomi – The Chronicles of a Happy Divorcée

Chapter 73 – Crush at First Sneeze

This blog is a book. Maybe better to read from the beginning? 🙂

Just Past Midnight, 22 February 2016.

Game Time!

Ah, where were we?

Yes. Christian loads the dirty dishes into the dishwasher. “My job! You did all that cooking already.”

“Btw, I bought the champagne at the airport – like I promised – to celebrate finally meeting my mysterious Anna! Shall we have a glass tonight?”

“Yes! And, Christian…?”

“Yes?”

“Do you still have some energy left? We could play one of those card games I told you about.” — Somehow her voice sounds so feminine and sweet in her own ears. Wow, where is that coming from? I’m such a tough lady!

“Of course. I’m feeling much better now after your delicious veggie soup.” — He smiles – looking better indeed.

“Great. So why don’t we sit on the sofa? Have our champagne there?”

Christian has been pleasant company for dinner. Anna feels good around him, but thinks he is quite mysterious, a bit like Finnish guys? It’s hard to know what they are thinking…

Just a little bit of flirting since the soup?

He is easy to talk with, nonetheless, and very well-mannered. It surely feels as though they have known each other for a year? Is that how it feels when there’s chemistry?

I should be stronger. Still unsure about this guy. The meal conversation was just OK. Nothing too impressive. He was shy!

But why does it suddenly feel so good again?? I think it’s the good manners, the dishes he’s loaded into the washer.

And… he’s brought champagne to celebrate meeting me in person. A romantic gesture?

The mystery – the game – is a turn on. There is electricity between you, but you just don’t know what’s gonna happen. Or even how much he likes you.

Anna, you like him, but you want to see if he’ll win you over fully. Keep up – in person – the good work he’s put in through the messages and calls. The challenge is a turn on, too. Did you know that?

OK. Let’s see how he’ll do at my board games. See if he really is smart.

Anna switches off the dining table lights. The living room is as not as bright anymore, as they sit on her couch to play Ugh over the wooden antique chest with the added wheels. She informs him he’ll learn the games by playing – because she will tell him the rules as they move along.

He wins the first game, she sits closer to him. Side by side. She wins the next, their legs are touching slightly now. More relaxed and familiar with each other? There is tension in the air – that much I’m certain of.

“Atishoo. Aaaatisho. Oh, excuse me!” — He goes to the bathroom to blow his nose.

Cute guy! He flew in to see me – with champagne – despite his cold. Oh, Anna! I think you may have a little crush.

“Sorry for that. I’m back. So… the game is tied. 1 x 1. One more round? The winner takes it all and I’m gonna beat you again.”

“No way you’ll win,” she defies him, with a completely different kind of scoring system she’s keeping in her mind.

🎼 We’ll have a good time, baby, don’t you worry
And if we’re still playin’ around, boy, that’s just fine. 🎶 I think!!

Sorry, Anna can’t remember who won the challenge. Eurgh.

Oh! Who cares! The games are really fun, but the whole point is obviously just being able to sit very close to each other. You know as much, right?

🎼 Give in this time and show me some affection…

We shouldn’t even think about tomorrow
Sweet memories will last a long, long time 🎶

The game ends. They have a laugh and he says something. Whatever – it is not important. Christian stands up to take their glasses back to the kitchen.

“It’s getting pretty late, I should get going,” he tests her.

“Really? Let’s play another game! This one here, Love Letter. I’m on holiday, remember? So there’s no hurry. No alarm clocks for tomorrow,” she tests him back.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes! Please?”

“OK, so let me refill a glass of champagne for us to share. Wow. This is the cleanest fridge I have ever seen.” — He stands there, admiring the insides.

“Stop it, you’re just saying that. I haven’t cleaned it for weeks!”

“And you’ve bought grapes!” — Christian adds. — “Haha. Naughty! But remember I’m the sick one, so you’re gonna do all the mouth-feeding.”

“You’re funny, Christian. That will be dessert for later. If you win!! We shall see.”

Love Letter ends and Christian leans back on the couch. She turns towards him and lightly touches his blue SuperDry shirt, complimenting him on his choice of outfit.

He grabs her hand and their fingers intertwine. She smiles. Maybe blushes just a little bit. They say a few things. Anna can’t remember what, but she remembers how she felt with him. The growing desire. His long warm fingers. His mouth.

The flirting is intense now. Finally! Magnetism draws them together, and now they are kissing and kisssing. Amidst the zillion butterflies fluttering their amazing little wings in the air. Zizzzz. This feels so electric. Zizzz.

They look at each other. Zizzzz. Deep gazes. Zizzzz. The desire is so intense. Zizzzz……….

“Anna, you’re so beautiful, sexy girl.” — clothes being dropped everywhere.

.
🎼 Let’s get excited, we just can’t hide it
I’m about…

Oh boy, I want to love you, feel you
Wrap myself around you

I’m so excited, and I just can’t hide it
And I know, I know, I know, I know, I know I want you 🎶

🎼 I want to squeeze you, please you
I just can’t get enough
And if you move real slow, I’ll let it go

I’m so excited, and I just can’t hide it
I’m about to lose control and I think I like it
I’m so excited, and I just can’t hide it
And I know, I know, I know, I know, I know I want you

I’m so excited (look what you do to me), and I just can’t hide it (you got me burning up)
I’m about to lose control and I think I like it (yeah)
I’m so excited (how did you get to me?), and I can’t deny, no, no, no (I’ve got to give it up)
(Oh, oh, oh, oh)I know, I know, that I want you

I’m so excited (look what you do to me), oh boy (you got me burning up)
(Oh, oh, oh, oh) Hey, hey I think I like it (yeah)
I’m so excited (how did you get to me?), you got me (I’ve got to give it up)
(Oh, oh, oh, oh) Oh, ooh I like it boy

I’m so excited (look what you do to me), oh, you got me burning up (burning up)
(Oh, oh, oh, oh, ow) 🎶

Obs. 🎼 (Oh, oh, oh, oh) 🎶

I’m So Excited lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC

Chapter 53 – Five And Counting

Tuesday, 16 February 2016.

Day 58

After Kristiina’s late call yesterday, Anna remebered it was payday and she still had to pay all her bills on Nordea’s netbank, so she’s pretty exhausted…

So little sleep! Eurgh…

Christian’s good morning cheers Anna up.

10:46 Morning! 😊 5 and counting. Just getting up.

11:07 Lucky you. I need a power nap. 😊

Haha. Do it. ☺️ Get under your desk. And put your feet up.

11:15 Under the desk already. 15 good min. – then I can work again with joy and creativity.

11:16 Still lost? Haha. Sorry for the confusion. Our dates are written in granite. 😊 I’m feeling ill today. Finally my cold is coming out. Will work from bed today. Hope you have a good morning!

Sorry for your cold. Take care, stay warm!! Hope you get well soon. And if you don’t, I completely understand if you can’t make it on Sunday, Monday, etc… Although it would be a pity. Did you buy that Berocca? And if you have a cough, Vick Vapourub under your feet and warm socks before you go to bed. Shouldn’t cough at all at night. 😊

12:11 Thanks. Got the Berrocca and feeling a bit better. Vicks on my feet?? Never tried that before! 😊 Thanks for the tips. I’ll certainly be well by Sunday.

IMG_2425 – kopio

12:31 I got this mug from my best friends this month. Happy you’re planning on getting better til Sunday!

13:03 Ahh. That’s nice. Did one of your students bring you an apple? I thought that only happened in the movies. 😊

13:11 Yeah, unfortunately only in the movies, but then again, poisoned apples only happen in Snow White. So, all’s good!

13:30 Haha. Safer to buy your own then. Send me some selfie inspiration please?

Anna sends him two.

.
Nice pictures!! I have to admit, I’m not looking my best today. But I’ll send you my smile selfie a little later. Promise.

14:25 Good!

Talking of promises, remember my pupils’ tasks? Their own list of “My Favorite Things”?

Here are the results:

IMG_2426(1) – kopio

Ah… I just love inspiring the pupils to find their best work within themselves. So proud of them! Here are three of my favorites:

IMG_2421 – kopio

14:27 Amazing, isn’t it?

IMG_2428 – kopio

14:29 Awe-inspiring. This girl is just genious!

IMG_2418 – kopio

So romantic! Oh, so very relatable.

Obs. Artwork published with the pupils’ permission (and no names)!

All names have been changed, and chat messages were published with the match’s kind permission.

Obs. Day 58 and five to go?

Chapter 52 – Kristiina’s Phone Call

Monday, 15 February 2016.

Still Day 57

Just as Anna is entering her building – less annoyed after the fresh air and the jog – her phone rings.

It’s her daughter, beloved Kristiina.

“Hi, sweetheart, how are things over there at dad’s?”

“Oh, mom. I’m so stressed out!” — she sobs.

Poor darling dear!

“What’s up? Good that you called me.”

“I’m just exhausted. Feeling stressed out and a little down.

“There’s way too much school work! Essays. Normal homework. Exams.

“The school days are soooo long. I come home tired, rest for ten minutes and then study until 1 a.m. I can’t take it anymore.” — she laments.

“Not enough sleep, not enough time for hobbies or exercise. Not enough time for my friends… And now the divorce and two homes. I’m feeling upset. Help?”

Eurgh! We stupid adults can’t be happy together and our teens have to suffer the consequences.

Eurgh.

But we tried everything!

“Kristiina, my dear, so sorry you’re feeling that way. I understand. I do! Please, always call me and talk it out. Any time.

“OK, mom.”

“What can I say? Is your father there? Can he help you?

“Kris, you know he and I tried everything, right? At least you know we stayed together for as long as we could? For your sake.”

“Oh, mom! I wish you hadn’t. It was horrible to see some of the fights and have so many family holidays ruined. No. It’s better this way. You deserve better. You both deserve more love in your every day.”

“Oh…” — I feel the same way.

“Yes, I really wish you had divorced earlier…

“It’s just a little overwhelming right now. I’m exhausted.”

“Kris, I’m glad you called me. Do you want to come over tomorrow? We can have a snack together any time, you know that.” — they’ll always be my priority. I’m still raising our teens.

Kristiina promises to come over if she feels the need to.

“Just wanted to talk… It’s good that you and dad accepted my suggestion.”

Recently, she suggested they live two whole weeks at one place before moving to the other parent’s. That way, there’s less packing and moving here and there all the time.

“The new system feels better? You’ve always been wise – we do listen to what you have to say.” — Anna smiles.

“I miss you, you know! But it’s nice you send me pictures and messages on WhatsApp every day. And your prom dance is in four days. Wow. You’re going to look so beautiful! I can’t wait to see you.

“Why don’t we look into you studying a bit slower? In Finland you can go through high school in four years. Please consider it. You’d have more time to sleep and meet friends…”

With Kristiina it’s always like that. We have to tell her: study less, sleep more, go party, live a little, have fun. Sweet girl! So responsible.

Now where were we?

Back to Christian – the Englishman, of course. The other one’s out for good. Gosh.

20:07 Basically it’s free time Sunday and Monday. 😊

21:15 Hi! Good to hear from you. Was just on the phone with my daughter. Maybe I’ll tell you later. Excited to meet you on Sunday. But getting confused with the dates. I guess your work plans keep changing? ☺️ If you want, you can reserve only Sunday and Monday initially. And if we feel we still want to see each other again during that week, then you’ll let me know if any extra time comes up.

21:24 Good evening. 😊 I’m coming to see you Sunday, and free all day Monday and Tuesday morning. If you want to see me… Hope that all makes sense. Sorry for the confusion!!

Still lost.

Obs. All names have been changed, and chat messages were published with the match’s kind permission.

Obs. Day 57 was a long, long day.

Chapter 20 – A Little Place in Finland

This blog is a book. Maybe better read from the beginning? 🙂

There is a little place in Finland – so unpretentious – that invites you to come and relax for a few days. Its calming breeze seems to whisper, “You are your truest self with me, so drop your guard, inhale and exhale, and notice your contentment”.

It’s a place where nature envelops you with tranquility and its little birds tweet in the morning.

Other than that, all you can hear are the sounds of silence. And your own steps in the snow.

To get there, you must drive for a pretty long time in the countryside, before taking a left turn onto a dirt road in the forest.

A beautiful forest. Hilly – majestic in its simplicity.

It’s no touristic site, nor does it aspire any fame. It is just whole and happy to be what it is.

Precious. Priceless.

Ten kilometers down the dirt road, after various curves of peaceful expectation, you come to a little farm where the dogs start barking to announce your arrival, a few horses neigh behind a white wooden fence, and the lady in her late sixties who owns the place comes out to greet you with a warm smile and animated chatter. Her husband is a friendly man, too, though he talks much, much less.

They’ll lead the way, ten minutes further down to their lake and the little cottage you’ve rented to spend a few days at. There, you can enjoy total privacy and solitude. Naps, the fireplace, healthy meals (and some Fazer chocolate, of course).

Anna loves jogging and walking around the lake. And all the hard work of carrying logs from the woodshed to the cottage.

The property has electricity, but no running water, which makes the whole experience even more special, as the water to do the dishes has to be fetched from the lake.

Once a day, you sit in the sauna and let it revive your whole being – body and soul – as you look out the sauna window at the amazing views with pine and birch trees, before a skinny dip in the hole in the ice.

Avanto, in Finnish.

For her, the place is loaded – but only with good memories and emotions. The first two times, she came here to celebrate a very white Christmas with Mr. Ex, their little kids and dear friends.

Santa Claus showed up too, making his way slowly to the cottage in the unblemished snow. Four-year-old Kristiina was so excited to meet Santa in person, but then she recognized our friend, “It’s Rick, it’s Rick!” she giggled happily, while Baby Joey slept through the whole thing.

Anna will always be grateful to Rick for introducing her to this place.

In the next chapter, permit me to forward our story to February 2017, a little over a year after Anna’s divorce.

This is the first time Anna is here at the cottage alone.

All her stays have been special, but the best two were with CT2, aka Tinder Date #16, aka let’s wait and see.

Are you getting any curious? Well, if you’re patient…

…You might get a few glimpses into the warmest, most passionate parts of her sielu soon.

Obs. Next, flashforward to day 428 since moving out.

Chapter 18 – Downsides and Upsides

This blog is a book. Maybe better read from the beginning? 🙂

Monday, 1 February 2016.

Day 43

Anna’s just arrived home after having coffee with her old-time friend after work. They’ve known each other since Anna’s wedding day, back in 1995, when Mary was brought to the festivities as a +1.

It’s always lovely to catch up with a lady friend, isn’t it? A good dose of oxytocine and your stress levels come tumbling down.

Anna’s told Mary about joining Tinder and they giggled about her first dates.

Despite the fact that Mary felt quite shocked with that piece of news! For one, she’d never even heard of dating apps and, being the very wise, well-behaved type, Mary doesn’t really fathom Anna’s decision.

“What’s the hurry, dear creature? Take some time, enjoy life! You’ve only been single for a month and a half,” she exclaims wide-eyed.

Nonetheless, Mary’s a good listener and always shows great respect for her friend, so she just reminds her to be careful, which Anna promises to do.

Hey, I don’t know about you, but the first twenty years of Anna’s life were spent in a very close-knit and cheerful, oftentimes noisy circle of relatives, friends, classmates, and above all, her musical parents and siblings.

In the next twenty years, she found herself constantly surrounded by all of the aforementioned, with the addition of her two beloved kids.

And handsome Mr. Ex.

That is, when it felt like he was present at all.

Volleyball is Anna’s favorite sport and now I can say I finally understand the reason. Involving constant team work and cooperation, it is such a social game. No wonder why she plays it ten hours a week, loving every moment of it.

You see, when you’re divorced and your kids are practically adults, there are some nice upsides to your life. You can focus on your hobbies, spend hours and hours with friends; even decide to sleep over after a visit, chatting and laughing all night long around their dinner table.

If you want to, you can live sparingly and save all your money to the last dime. Or just go on a shopping spree and, who cares, save next month. Good-bye having to discuss and agree on those things with your spouse, or then deal with the disapproving frowns.

The first year of divorce is fun. Mmm. Go on Tinder, courageously look for love again.

Oh, and does Anna enjoy a tidy flat or what.

Having to do the laundry only once or twice a month and – oh, oh – eating easy-to-prepare eggs and salads. Healthy. And cheap, too.

I’m no advocate for divorce – God forbid. But, you can up and travel during all your holidays. Make last minute plans and then change them, just like that. Hey, maybe not even come back home from a long trip before the very last vacation night…

…On the other hand, there is a downside.

One of many. 🙁 But the one I’m talking about is coming home to an empty house.

Don’t believe me? Maybe that’s because your life is always busy with family members and unending chores, so you’d gladly accept a quiet, home-alone day. Cozy and relaxing – I can understand that.

I remember.

But, we are social beings and life is to be shared. So, when Anna comes home, night after night to her dark, empty flat, knowing nobody is there, and no one is going to come in through the door, not even later in the evening… Nobody’s going to wish me good night… I’ll tell you, at times her stress grows with the hours.

It can feel pretty lonesome and cold. So, that’s why.

Flash forward to 2017 and………….

Obs. Day 43 since moving out. What now?